Shaken, Not Stirred, Baby Syndrome (1124 hits)
Category: Science & EnvironmentalRating: 0.59 on 30 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Stabkill (View user info) at 2008-02-27 10:25:10 EST
I don't believe in the science behind Shaken Baby Syndrome. Using the scientific method, one would think there needs to be a whole lot more research than simple hearsay.
Where is the field testing on this subject? I just don't see it happening and it is desperately needed. Until this happens, it is just a bunch of theories.
Scientists need to take a group of 100 babies and mark them with cattle-like ear tags. Specially modified paint can shakers fitted with straps for a young baby will be utilized to shake babies.
The first test group of 25 babies will be shaken for 30 minutes. A second group of 25 babies will be shaken for 15 minutes. The third group will be shaken for a mere 10 minutes. The final group will not be shaken at all.
Any ill effects on the test subjects will be noted. At the end of the test, the remaining 25 babies will be used to reinforce the previous results by further study.
Until this testing can be accomplished, I really think that one can dismiss Shaken Baby Syndrome as nothing but a wives tale or myth.
User Reviews
Submitted by haikumikoo (user info) at 2008-02-28 03:03:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
A post about baby shaking just has so much potential for hilarity, and I didn't laugh once.
Submitted by kuroneko_sama (user info) at 2008-02-27 22:27:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
just got me a Wii (near impossible to find round here)
auto "Me Wii" +2
Submitted by Hookhand (user info) at 2008-02-27 15:51:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-02-27 10:27:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
is it 'old wives tale'
or
'old wive's tale'
============================
Neither. It's "Old wives' tale"
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2008-02-27 14:31:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Yeah, they deny the existence of Sudden Infant Death Syndrome too, and yet suddenly...
http://stuff.ubersite.com/1166546209130013009/1/runnin'%20round%20my%20brain.JPG
Submitted by rob_berg (user info) at 2008-02-27 14:10:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I think this needed to sound a little more 'genuine' to pull it off correctly.
...the effort was good, though.
Freak.
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2008-02-27 14:10:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
As long as they humanly kill all the babies at the end of the experiment Im all for it.
Remember the three Rs people! Save a baby today!
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2008-02-27 13:30:13 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
Submitted by BeforeEmily (user info) at 2008-02-27 09:57:32 CST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2008-02-27 07:47:14 PST (#)
Ranking: 0
The evidence comes from the injuries.
Submitted by LittleMonster (user info) at 2008-02-27 11:56:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-02-27 11:19:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
i know this was a joke, but i just couldn't laugh. little bit ago i read the updated article about this infant in peoria whose parents left him strapped in a car seat for eight days without changing or feeding him until he starved to death. now i just feel sick.
i think my day has been ruined by that, and so just wanted to generally bring down everyone elses good time as well.
______
Well fuck. I think that's enough for me to pack uber in for the day. I'll go and find the whisky shall I?
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-02-27 11:54:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This is better than +.37, you fucktards.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2008-02-27 11:41:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
With a testing method like that you should totally work for Nestle.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-02-27 11:29:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
the thing that really turned my stomach about it was the fact that the parents were both home the whole time, feeding themselves and cleaning themselves and playing video games, according to their own accounts.
Submitted by forthewin (user info) at 2008-02-27 11:27:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
IN SOVIET RUSSIA, BABY SHAKES YOU
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-02-27 11:26:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
oh...ok thanks for the um....clarification
*wanders away thinking about the state of 'things'*
Submitted by forthewin (user info) at 2008-02-27 11:26:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Surprisingly funny.
Cheers and stuff.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-02-27 11:25:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
well, the child was in the car seat for 8 days before he was discovered.
i'm sure he was dead before the eight days were up.
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-02-27 11:23:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
8 days....surely they must have given the kid water...i don't think you can live for 8 days without water.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2008-02-27 11:19:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
i know this was a joke, but i just couldn't laugh. little bit ago i read the updated article about this infant in peoria whose parents left him strapped in a car seat for eight days without changing or feeding him until he starved to death. now i just feel sick.
i think my day has been ruined by that, and so just wanted to generally bring down everyone elses good time as well.
Submitted by Nellypaal (user info) at 2008-02-27 11:08:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-02-27 10:52:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
thanks kids...I'm smarter just for coming to uber today!
there'll be something special in both of your stockings this year.
------
Your thanks are sufficient.
Submitted by BeforeEmily (user info) at 2008-02-27 10:57:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2008-02-27 07:47:14 PST (#)
Ranking: 0
The evidence comes from the injuries.
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-02-27 10:52:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
thanks kids...I'm smarter just for coming to uber today!
there'll be something special in both of your stockings this year.
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2008-02-27 10:47:16 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
It's "old wives' tale." Wives is plural so "wive's" is ungrammatical.
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2008-02-27 10:47:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
The evidence comes from the injuries.
Submitted by Nellypaal (user info) at 2008-02-27 10:47:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Ha.
Muddy: it's old wives' tale. There's no such thing as a wive.
Submitted by Stabkill (user info) at 2008-02-27 10:36:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
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Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2008-02-27 09:33:00 CST (#)
Ranking: 2
I like your stance on this, but where are you on the "kicked in the face" baby syndrome?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Kicked in the face" baby syndrome causes global warming.
Submitted by ilikesteak (user info) at 2008-02-27 10:33:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I like your stance on this, but where are you on the "kicked in the face" baby syndrome?
Submitted by hour_man (user info) at 2008-02-27 10:30:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Did I just say soccer?! I meant football.
Submitted by hour_man (user info) at 2008-02-27 10:30:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Did you hear that, Marge? She called me a baboon! The stupidest,
ugliest, smelliest ape of them all!
-- Homer Simpson
Lisa's Substitute
-----
I laughed.
SBS is what people accuse nannies of all the time.
Did you know that kids under 12 are only allowed to header the ball a certain number of time each per soccer match, this is to reduce brain damage... ha! However rugby is still fine.
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2008-02-27 10:27:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
is it 'old wives tale'
or
'old wive's tale'
?
Submitted by Ltap (user info) at 2008-02-27 10:27:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
What the hell is "Shaken Baby Syndrome"?
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-02-27 10:26:48 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Yeah, Moe, that team sure did suck last night! They just plain
sucked! I've seen teams suck before, but they were the suckiest bunch
of sucks that ever sucked!
-- Homer Simpson
Team Homer