"But I don't want to go among the mad people," Alice said. (806 hits)
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Submitted by Ballare (View user info) at 2008-03-04 17:27:28 EST
"Oh dear," sighed Alice, placing her chin in her palm, "I will never get anywhere if I continue on like this. I should rather have liked to stay with the Hatter and the March Hare for tea, for all their foolishness!"
It struck Alice at this point - for she had been very inattentive, as well she might, due to all the shrinking and growing that had been going on - that the hour was turning late. She could see the sky through the ceiling of branches above her, deepening blue, and the moon peered at her through the tangle of tree-limbs.
"I wonder if they have remembered to give Dinah her dish of milk?" (She glanced about to be sure she would not offend any of the local mice and rats with the mention: Dinah was her cat) "She will be missing me terribly, I should think. I certainly miss her."
She stopped to consider her dilemma, and sunk to the curved top of a large, spongy toadstool.
Alice was so deep in thought that she was completely startled by the appearance of the Cheshire Cat: so slowly did he appear, grin-first, and then unhurriedly materializing. It wasn't until his swishing tail brushed by her hand that she started and nearly fell off her mushroom perch.
"Oh!" she exclaimed, overjoyed to see a familiar face. "The Cheshire Cat!"
At this point she realized the Cat's ears had not yet appeared, and thought it would be of no use speaking to a bodiless set of rather sharp teeth.
After a few moments, while the Cat was still an indiscriminate form of fur and ears and arched back, his voice greeted Alice. "Hello again. The sun is falling and the sky-lamps are lit. Have you no place to go? The Jabberwock roams these woods when the Moon Man smiles."
Alice was rather taken aback. Petulantly, she replied, "No, I have not, and what business do you have, appearing so indiscriminately, so willy-nilly? You gave me quite a fright." And, to herself, Alice added, "And yet he still has no paws! How will he go about catching mice?"
The Cheshire Cat gazed back at her and blinked, slowly.
"Whatever would I be catching mice for?"
"Why- all cats catch mice! Even Dinah brings them home and leaves them on our doorstep, if she does not eat them first."
"And does Dinah talk? And vanish so?" (Presently the Cat did vanish, and it struck Alice perhaps she had somehow offended him.)
"Cheshire Cat? Come back, please." Although she was unsure of how, exactly, she had affronted him, Alice apologized, feeling somewhat silly at speaking to mid-air. "I meant nothing by it."
"I'll have you know," The Cat's waspish voice floated by her ear, "Many of my friends are of the Mus musculus persuation. That's the common house mouse, which I don't expect you knew."
Alice shook her head in agreement, quite afraid to speak for running the risk of provoking the Cat. Everyone down the rabbit hole seemed so very disagreeable!
The Cat appeared once again, and perfunctorily ran his tongue over his fur.
"Well, I suppose you should come with me."
Alice's brow wrinkled, and forgetting for the instant her vow of silence, asked, "Why? Where-ever will we go?"
"Does it matter?" the Cat asked, and began to saunter away, his striped back end swaying behind him.
Alice felt she could do nothing but stand, brush herself off, and follow him through the forest.
Recalling something the Cat had said earlier, Alice asked, "And what did you say about the Jabberwock?" She shivered and wrapped her arms around herself, fearing imagined sharpened claws and feral eyes. "Does it hunt at night?"
The Cat shrugged, a sinuous shrug that ran from his shoulders and rippled down his spine and ended with a dismissive flick of his tail. "You needn't worry."
"Why-ever not? Am I not delicious enough?" Alice frowned, irked that she should be excluded from the Jabberwock's diet simply by virtue of being herself (something she certainly could not amend).
"Ah," said the Cheshire Cat. "No, I don't think that is it, precisely. But little girls in any proper narrative don't get eaten. Everyone knows that."
"I am no character in a book!" Alice protested.
"Oh, really? I must be mistaken then," said the Cat lazily, navigating by a large blossoming flower that seeped noxious fumes, and leaping lightly over a mossy log, "I was under the impression you fancied yourself important."
Alice bristled. She replied tartly, "I would like to think so!"
"And so you will agree only important things happen to important people?"
"Y-yes," Alice hesitantly agreed, allowing herself to answer despite her irritation.
"And that books are written regarding only imporant things?"
"Yes," Alice agreed again, just as hesitantly.
"And so," the Cat triumphantly concluded, "to each their own."
Alice began to frown - that did not make sense at all! - when the Cat interuppted himself, "no, no, that was not right. A bird in the hand is better than two in the bush? No, that is not it either. Mind your Ps and Qs?"
He muttered to himself while Alice paused to gather her skirt and step gingerly over a particularly large, yellow slug. It rolled up its eyes at her and burbled what sounded like, 'flurop poros findarkle' at her, and she squeaked and leapt ahead just in time to hear the Cat continue,
"- but you see, my dear girl, that is not the point. You must understand that if you believe you are important, then everything that happens to you must be important as well, and all the people you meet will be moved by your importance. Every thing you do and touch will be sparkling gold with your influence. And people will write books about that, in the end, when imagination fails.
"Ah," the Cat finished brightly, "We've arrived."
User Reviews
Submitted by wookie (user info) at 2008-03-07 20:46:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-03-07 05:10:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"grin-first"
Submitted by ghola (user info) at 2008-03-05 23:12:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Lib (user info) at 2008-03-05 16:45:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2008-03-05 09:14:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by DancingOtter (user info) at 2008-03-05 06:50:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Rather brilliant!
Submitted by DrogoRoch (user info) at 2008-03-05 06:16:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
That was really nice.
Submitted by ChaosJester (user info) at 2008-03-05 02:22:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
'flurop poros findarkle'
(chuckle)
Very nice.
Well written, tight sentence structure, remarkable imagery.
Just luverly.
Submitted by maiorano84 (user info) at 2008-03-05 00:31:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Fucking awesome.
I'm really hoping this isn't copy pasta.
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2008-03-04 23:43:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by X54 (user info) at 2008-03-04 22:54:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"The Cat shrugged, a sinuous shrug that ran from his shoulders and rippled down his spine and ended with a dismissive flick of his tail."
Nice.
Submitted by Amontillado (user info) at 2008-03-04 21:39:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Sacrilicious (user info) at 2008-03-04 19:43:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This reminded me that ghola wrote this
http://www.ubersite.com/m/86329
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2008-03-04 18:25:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Dinosaurs ROCK!
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2008-03-04 18:14:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
A great book, didyaknow- Pan's Labyrinth was inspired by it.
All this and more on the news at 8.
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2008-03-04 17:43:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
bubba=jimboruckus=sadie=pedo
Submitted by Bubba2341 (user info) at 2008-03-04 17:39:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Great stuff.
Submitted by HotWillie (user info) at 2008-03-04 17:37:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by SkullBiter (user info) at 2008-03-04 17:37:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I wouldnt want to be around if there wasnt any imagination.
Submitted by jimboruckus (user info) at 2008-03-04 17:34:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment