Day 3 is hell and after that, its plain sailing… (1182 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 0.7 on 95 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by JesterLilt (View user info) at 2008-07-18 10:32:57 EDT
I've stopped smoking again for about the gazillionth time but this time I'm deadly serious. No messing, no jokes, I will not ever put another cancer stick to my lips ever again. I will not fall victim to the having a drink I must have a smoke scam. I will not in my head profess life is just far too stressful and the walls of the universe will cave in and the fabric of time collapse if I don't get a draw of a cigarette.
I will not smoke weed...
Smoking weed leads back into smoking cigarettes regularly so again I will not be tempted to toke when I end up at a party after a good session in a pub / club.
I've been walking around in a semi-conscious, detached from this universe state all week. I've worked, I've walked, I've got out of bed, brushed my teeth but honestly, there is a piece of me missing this week. I most certainly don't feel myself...
I've had my headphones in nearly constantly, I've been doing a lot of thinking... Music and people and places and memories and smells and feelings...
I remember the smell of Christmas. How I would tip toe downstairs at 5am to open my presents. The cold chill in the air, the smell of Christmas dinner mostly prepared the night before wafting up the stairs, the smell of brandy, whisky and run, fruit, nuts, chocolate all wrapped up in a warm exciting Christmas feeling. The smell of Christmas is safe... a feeling of family, giving and plenty.
And now onto music...
True faith - New Order
I used to live near the beach. It is a breathtaking beach in a bay surrounded by cliffs with a little harbour at the opening of the bay. This song reminds of climbing up the cliffs in the early evening and looking out across the bay towards the harbour where the lights would reflect perfectly on the water. I'd sit on the edge of the cliffs for ages, knees tucked up under my chin just watching the world with my headphones in.
Its funny how different songs can be associated with different people and situations...
Natalie Merchant, probably my favourite female artist on the planet and my most listened to. I can honestly say I don't think there's anything she's written or sung that I don't like. I came across her when I was going out with a banjo playing guitarist postman. Every night we'd go to sleep to the sound of Natalie and she's stuck with me ever since. She gets me through the good times, she gets me through the bad times. She reminds me of playing my violin at folk sessions with my banjo playing boyfriend. How scared and excited I was to puck up my violin and play in public. Something I haven't done for a long time.
David Bowie has been with me ever since I first saw Labyrinth. Seeing David Bowie in tights as the Goblin King probably made me realise for the first time that there really was quite a difference between boys and girls. Because of Labyrinth, I've been a follower of David Bowie ever since and probably will be for the rest of my life. Labyrinth was a stroke of genius, I think there are many more Bowie fans on the back of that movie.
Cautioners - Jimmy Eat World
I'm pretty sure I've been a Jimmy Eat World follower well before the Emo movement enslaved them to their cause. This song reminds me of another boy I used to go out with. When we first started going out I kept finishing with him. I can't remember what for now and I'm guessing the reason was probably trivial but I do remember I did it an awful lot. For some reason, this song was always playing 'You'll change your mind come Monday...' and I always did, for awhile anyway.
Cake - many albums and university. One particular university marathon! Final year, final project due in three days, haven't slept in as many days, haven't started writing up project yet - oh bugger! My boyfriend has oh so kindly picked up a box of pill shaped class As and so commences my own scientific project. I think to myself, "There's no way I'm staying awake to start writing this, I've been up for three days already give or take a few hours here and there, I'm knackered but this really needs to be handed in... what do I do?" ... "I know, I'll fill myself full of pills and not move from in front of my computer until this project is written up." So that's what I did. And I'll say it was a stroke of genius because that's what it was.
Three days give or take toilet breaks and some food rations although not much but I did sit and write my project from start to finish pilled off my box. Sort of an interesting one for me as well as my dissertation was on ADHD, the effects of Ritalin and neuronal plasticity. Seeing as Ritalin is an amphetamine also I was interested to find out if I put myself in a tunnel vision, mucho concentration required situation, whether or not it would pay off. My goodness gracious me it did! 93% for my project, one of the best in the year and one of my best marks at university. All this spent to Cake albums on repeat over and over. There is a fond place in my heart for Cake.
Porcupine Tree - probably my favourite band ever. I discovered them in a taxi in Newcastle. I couldn't believe the eloquent complexity of the music coming out of said tazi dirver's stereo. 'Not the usual 'Eternal Flame' or 'Hit ma Baby One More Time' bollocks my ears are usually raped with when I place my bottom within a taxi.' I thought. Mesmerised, I listen on... I ask him who it is... And he looks at me like I'm dog shit on the pavement.
"You don't know who this is?"
"No, who is it?"
"This is Porcupine Tree."
"They're awesome!"
"Yeah, you think so, you'll get out of this taxi and you'll not remember their name."
"I'll bet you I will!" Now I'm making a mental note and repeating Porcupine Tree many times in my head so I don't forget. No mean feat as I'm totally wankered. I then noticed my taxi driver was quite cute in an aging sort of Kurt Cobain kind of way and I was distressed my taxi journey would soon be at an end. Newcastle taxi driver, wherever you are, you are awesome and I hope you are still spreading fine tunes around Newcastle.
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And now its Friday and so endeth my disjointed week. On Monday I woke up with a bad feeling and I wasn't to be disappointed. My step dad called and he told me my mum was in hospital having just had a heart attack. I went in to see her and her lying there tore me to pieces, a real felling of dread I can remember feeling twice.
The first time I felt that feeling was when I was seven years old as I watched in horror as a taxi mowed over my little sister on the way down to the school bus. I saw her fly from his bonnet, across the road and I heard her head crack as it hit the wall. Then he drove away. He was never charged... My little sister lived but she did spend 6 months in hospital.
The second time I had that feeling I'd just come home after a night out. I think I was 16. My mum was sitting at the kitchen table speaking to my auntie. It was early and I wondered what had happened. My mum turned to me, "Your brothers in hospital, he's been stabbed in the neck in a pub in Catterick. I'm going down, they don't think he's going to make it, he's lost a lot of blood." My brother did make it after dying twice and spitting out the blood of three men.
My mum is 56, she's smoked 40 fags a day for the last 30 years. She looks 10 years older than she should and her body is a wreck. A shock for her and a shock for me. I asked myself a few simple questions...
"Why am I smoking, I know its going to kill me right?"
"Did I before have any real intention stopping or an inclination to do so?"
"Do I really enjoy it?"
"Does it do anything for me?"
The answer to all the above is a very serious no ergo I am a stupid fuck for smoking. Seeing as I don't like being a stupid fuck, nor do I want to be lying in some hospital bed with a heart condition at 56 looking 10 years older than I should faced with the prospect of a heart bypass or worse, I think from now on I'll give them a miss larger than huge. No thanks! That's enough for me, time to get shot of the cancer sticks forever.
Probably enough about my crusade against heart disease and cancer... In all seriousness, I've never thought about losing my parents before and I can honestly say the prospect has terrified me. I hope like my sister and brother my mum pulls through. I'm 27 and its only in the last 3 years or so that I've really gotten to both my parents properly as adults. The rest of the time was spent helping (or not helping) me grow up. As they get older I realise more and more the roles have reversed, now the children are doing the looking after... making the decisions... planning for a future...
I hope the universe realigns itself next week and goes back to normal, the feeling of Christmas slips away...
User Reviews
Submitted by psikosismc (user info) at 2008-10-11 14:56:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by devildog (user info) at 2008-09-04 15:21:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by Naplander (user info) at 2008-08-30 14:46:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by bubba69 (user info) at 2008-08-24 15:50:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by spidy (user info) at 2008-08-18 15:33:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Linus is a jerk
Submitted by Linus (user info) at 2008-08-18 15:20:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 BOOM -- Dunno how much this is gonna do since I've +2d most of your posts anyway =P
Submitted by JohnnyACDC (user info) at 2008-08-12 07:26:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Simon says.......
Submitted by Fey (user info) at 2008-08-11 15:42:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I stopped smoking 1½ years ago.
Submitted by jayjonze (user info) at 2008-08-11 15:36:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by mrwolf (user info) at 2008-08-11 11:56:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I knew this would be about smoking.
I stopped 5 weeks and 1 day ago. I'm still counting but it's not as difficult now.
Hope your mum pulls through mate.
-P
Submitted by Mr_Asshat (user info) at 2008-08-11 11:43:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Wonderful, the millionth 'I've stopped smoking' post.
Submitted by PoeticSoul (user info) at 2008-07-23 14:12:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Not really very good.
Submitted by PukingDog (user info) at 2008-07-20 03:26:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I will give this a +1 for P-Tree, but among those who listen to them I think they are a little overrated. In Absentia is a good album, maybe their best, but it still has shit on it like Wedding Nails and Sound of Muzak... whatever. Here is a free tip of you like your "prog" a little on the heavy side: Baroness. I should get a royalty.
Submitted by Unabonger (user info) at 2008-07-20 03:05:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
no fucking way I'm reading all of that...I'll follow the herd and drop a +2 though in good faith that my constituents, while a fickle bunch, have rated you fairly and without bias.
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-07-18 18:45:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
yeah yeah yeah, very bored of smoking now.
I don't need good lucks honestlyy sweethearts and darlings! What I need is some bloody decent chat!
No more way da go not smoking and more of the 'Nice one but today this happened it was really fucking cool,' or 'You are a fucktard go rot in hell.' Anything but smoking now please!
Friday night drinks have made my brain say "For fuck sake, no more well wishing!" That and my boyfriend has fucked off again and I'm feeling miserable... asshole!
Best friend says dump his stuff on the street, best friend at work asks me coyly if I'm happy then gets plastered and tells me I should dump my boyfriend... alarm bells are ringing... curses to alcohol and well meaning life improving projects...!
Nevermind I survived the drinks, still not smoking!
Submitted by HateMudkips (user info) at 2008-07-18 15:19:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hope your mum recovers well.
I just quit on Wednesday. I agree with the Chantix being like methadone - I can be around smokers all day and I don't want to smoke in the slightest. Plus the vivid dreams are fun to have.
Submitted by monkeyswithguns (user info) at 2008-07-18 14:26:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I've been nicotine free for over 8 months now, by using Chantix, which is like methadone for cigarette smokers. You just don't think about it.
Also, I still smoke weed, and don't have any cravings for the tobacco at all. I actually used it as a substitute in conjunction with the Chantix.
Good luck!
Submitted by myshit (user info) at 2008-07-18 13:54:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
No Comment
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-07-18 13:20:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Awesome another PT lover! Greatest band ever and totally under listened to or I'm hanging around with the wrong people...
Submitted by Susie_Derkins (user info) at 2008-07-18 13:20:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Good on you. I quit in February of last year, put the money away and went to Cuba in Feb of this year. I miss it from time to time for the social aspect and I do get fleeting cravings when I smell one, but I'd never go back.
Submitted by Ballare (user info) at 2008-07-18 13:18:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I regularly play Porcupine Tree while shuffling people around in my shitty old car, and we usually have the same yell-back-and-forth conversation:
"HEY! HEY WHO IS THIS?"
"Porcupine Tree! Pretty good, eh?"
"Por- WHAT?"
"PORCUPINE TREE."
"THREE?"
"TREE."
"PORCUPINE... TREE?"
"Yeah!"
"YEAH. COOL!"
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-07-18 13:13:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
crunchy on the outside, soft on the inside
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2008-07-18 13:11:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
do manbearpigs have feelings too?
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-07-18 13:09:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
If you're bored doodles you can find out which Uber loser is raking my posts with -2s from their little black book of alters. Its getting mildly irritating.
And now roll on a barrage of faggotty fuckwits declaring they aint alters and they have feeling just like real people.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2008-07-18 13:06:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
I ain't quitting smoking and that's that.
Also, I once put the moves on Natalie Merchant in a bar in upstate NY about 25 years ago.
I struck out.
I think I called her a lesbo and grabbed some other tramp and left.
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2008-07-18 13:04:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
So could I fuck you with a lit cigar then?
I couldn't be more bored today.
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-07-18 12:57:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I always think I'm such a pussy. I don't or didn't smoke very much but for some reason its sooo bloody hard! I can't even imagine how painful it would be to give up with a real habit like my mum and dad. And people do it everyday! Hats off to them I say.
And the worst thing about stopping smoking is that all the non-smokers who've never done it are sooo patronising because they completely don't get it. They don't give you the proper round of applause a given up smoker deserves and needs to remain on the wagon.
I like people who've managed to give it up because I aspire to be the person running around with the airfreshener (orphy) telling people they're killing themselves. And, ex-smokers have the right to do it because they've been on both sides.
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2008-07-18 12:47:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I quit in 1986 when I realized how much money it was wasting. I gave my lighter to my dad - a nice Zippo with the USS Enterprise engraved on it. He still uses it, and coughs his head off every morning. I wish he'd quit too. One way or the other, I suppose one day he will.
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-07-18 12:44:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Aye, hence the title of this post - day 3 is hell.
Smoking is such a social activity. If I'm ever nervous about being in a new place, take a cigarette and go smoke it and you're bound to get talking to somebody else out smoking. Unfortunately it means all friends are mostly smokers making it more difficult to give up.
Guy I work with across from me is always out smoking and we always go out together. He roles so I can smell it when he's making one and about to go. Its playing havoc. I think the more you talk about it makes it easier though. It enforces your willpower rather than sitting in silence.
Throwing a tantrum also helps. My boyfriend smokes so did a bit of foot stamping last night telling him he had to hide his ashtray in the kitchen and not just smoke with the window open but right out the window, he's not allowed to kiss me stinking of smoke and if he comes in from the pub he must go for a shower before he comes to bed so I don't have to sleep with the smell. All totally unreasonable but I need it that way to begin with, until I can trust in my willpower a little bit more.
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2008-07-18 12:39:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I forgot to mention that for about 2-3 weeks I used the nicotine lozenges but I started with the least potent loznege (2mg doses) and did one every 2 hours. Now I pop a mint in when I want a cigarette because I pavlovianly tricked my mind into thinking it's getting nicotine everytime I eat something minty tasting.
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2008-07-18 12:39:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You never told me if never putting another cancer stick into your mouth included shlongy or not.
I guess TTOM too.
Submitted by experima (user info) at 2008-07-18 12:38:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hmm. if i kept a pack in my pocket it might drive me crazy. but part of me wants to do the cold turkey thing with a pack in my pocket just to 'prove' to myself how strong i am.
it is harder this time. before, i'd just get sick of them and that would be that. maybe smoke four or five in a year. this time last year i started up again and although i've never smoked more than ten a day in that time, i'm USED to it, have places i've habitually gotten in the habit of having one and certain times of day.
so just stopping altogether is better than, say, erasing one habitual smoke at a time until they're gone? say, not having one after work, or not having one before dinner, etc.?
i've also recently read the physical urge passes after 3 days, then it's psychological. true in your experience?
ok, i'm off to work but i'll check back later.
xx
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-07-18 12:37:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Ok, sorry Doodles, I'm being horrid. Apologies.
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2008-07-18 12:36:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Fanny fright?
What a faggoty thing to say.
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2008-07-18 12:33:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh no, you have it all wrong.
I want you both.
At the same time.
You won't even have to wear paper bags, or anything.
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-07-18 12:33:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I wondered why he was always hanging around... Guess we'll have to show him how to do it like animals Orphy although I can see him running off into the distance with an acute case of fanny fright.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-18 12:30:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
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Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2008-07-18 17:23:01 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
Right, so here is a thought.
I have penchant for disfigured women.
Why don't the both of you visit the states sometime and I can enjoy some very fun abomination sex.
What do you say banjo?
Orphelia?
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i don't appreciate being a second choice, Doodles.
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-07-18 12:29:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Exp - I'm the same. I only smoked about 10 a day, 20 when I'm out getting leathered. I've stopped loads of times before but I'm deadly serious this time. More serious than I've ever been. I'm also noticing the more I quit, the harder its getting. I'm determined to not have to suffer this feeling ever again. Cold turkey does it. I don't think I'm ever very serious about it when I'm using patches or chewing gum. I've never stopped very long using nicotine replacement, the most success I've had is cold turkey.
On a technique though, my dad used to smoke about 60 a day and one day he decided to quit. He carried an open pack always with cigarettes in his pocket. When he wanted one, he'd pull it out and put it in his mouth. He wouldn't light it, just smoke until the craving went away. It worked for him and I didn't think he'd ever stop. 15 years and he's never touched another one.
Submitted by experima (user info) at 2008-07-18 12:24:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
did you quit altogether immediately or did you start cutting back and cutting back gradually? i'm after a quit-smoking plan that works for me even though i smoke only about 4 cigarettes a day now. but i've been at it for years in varying degrees.
sorry about your mum. i hope she is going to get better and that maybe she'll quit along with you.
and good job quitting. i'm getting a feeling about how hard it is even if you don't smoke a lot. i just can't seem to go a whole day yet.
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2008-07-18 12:23:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Right, so here is a thought.
I have penchant for disfigured women.
Why don't the both of you visit the states sometime and I can enjoy some very fun abomination sex.
What do you say banjo?
Orphelia?
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-07-18 12:21:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Yeah, I melted my boyfriends trainers and the window at the same time. Place Glade air freshener on window, leak, fall off window, melt boyfriend's trainers below. He was not a happy puppy.
I don't have smelly nappies but I have a boyfriend with a smelly arse. Sir Fartalot! If his pungent aroma can be arrested I think any aroma can be arrested. At least... I hope my flat doesn't smell of fart. I will make a mental note to ask the next person who visits.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-18 12:19:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
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Submitted by gAGGLE (user info) at 2008-07-18 17:16:43 BST (#)
Ranking: -1
No Comment
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Oooh, look, someone broke out an alter just to kill your streak!
Don't blow, Banj.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-18 12:17:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
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Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-07-18 17:14:36 BST (#)
Ranking: 0
Glade plugins are far worse than cigarettes to live with!
Pour them on a pair of trainers or a painted surface and watch what happens. That stuff is being blown out into the air you breath. Can you imagine what its doing to your lungs? You should get them out of your house Orphy and only use natural fragrances. Glades are the work of the devil as are aerosol air fresheners. Soooo bad for you!
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No, wait, i put one on my pristine window sill while I used the socket for the hoover, it spilled and it peeled the fucking paint. When I saw my toddler chewing on the insert a few months ago I almost died. He was ok, but i kept saying, 'they peel paint!'
I need them though, even with the windows open my house smalls of dirty nappies and cat pee. I don't even have a cat anymore.
Natural freshners are not good. I bought some Yankee candles from QVC, they were not powerful enougyh for my pungent needs.
Submitted by gAGGLE (user info) at 2008-07-18 12:16:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
No Comment
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-07-18 12:14:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Glade plugins are far worse than cigarettes to live with!
Pour them on a pair of trainers or a painted surface and watch what happens. That stuff is being blown out into the air you breath. Can you imagine what its doing to your lungs? You should get them out of your house Orphy and only use natural fragrances. Glades are the work of the devil as are aerosol air fresheners. Soooo bad for you!
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-18 12:11:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Banj, get pregnant, you will stop smoking easily the instant you find out.
I have become the worse kind of ex smoker. when anyone comes over, I make them stand outside and give them an ashtray to use (my toddler picks up discarded butts and chews them). I then spray air freshner in a really theatrical fashion as they re enter my house. Turn up the glade plug ins too. just to emphasise my point.
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-07-18 12:08:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Aye poots, I'm trying the exercise thing and its working. Anything to keep the mind off the tar.
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2008-07-18 12:06:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
OH AND IT TOOK FOREVER TO FIND! Thanks Orgasmatron. Thanks for nothing!
Submitted by EatMeCompletely (user info) at 2008-07-18 12:05:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
My quitting smoking ended with this:
http://www.ubersite.com/m/81915
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2008-07-18 12:05:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Well friggin hell you try to give a guy some publicity and he ruins it by tooting his own horn. http://www.ubersite.com/m/100167 it is very good though.
Submitted by Poots (user info) at 2008-07-18 12:03:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
David Bowie is also a dirty glove sniffer. Where's the proof you ask it's all right here http://www.ubersite.com/m/100167 see for yourself.
Good luck with the nonsmoking I'm on my sixth(I think) week of nonsmoking and I still want one of the dirty little nails.
I did alot of working out because I couldn't sit still and all my friends still smoke, the thoughtless fucks, and I would get all antsy. I still drink and smoke herbs but everytime I want one,drunk stoned or otherwise, I do a bunch of push ups or sit ups and curls and go for runs through the city. It's kind of weird I know but try smoking a cigarette after 20 push ups or a mile and half run. You'll probably freakin vomit.
Oh and while working out I listen to that song from The Last Dragon it goes "WHEN YOU REACH THAT UPPER LEVEL YOUR MIND BODY AND SOUL WILL BE ONNNNNNE...When you got that glow your body shows and you won't let goooo" which rocks and some ween and some snoop dogg and some weezer and some phil collins and some pharrell and some modest mouse and some others but mostly that when you got that glow song from The Last Dragon.
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2008-07-18 12:01:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
My bad.
MANBEARPIG SIGHTING.
ALERT AL GORE.
THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Submitted by Spam (user info) at 2008-07-18 11:53:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Smoking makes you cool.
It's also big and clever.
loser.
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2008-07-18 11:49:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Sorry for the linkwhore (not really) but I have to pounce when I see Bowie and Labyrinth discussed:
http://www.ubersite.com/m/100167
http://www.ubersite.com/m/95875
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-07-18 11:47:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
OMG, Philip Schofield. Get in line F.J, he's mine first! I was loving him in the broom cupboard with Ed the Duck and does anybody remember the Butler?
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-07-18 11:46:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I have a total man-crush on that Phillip guy...silver hair...whatisname
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-07-18 11:45:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Doodles has one highly polished tombstone of a tooth protruding over his bottom lip. But his mum loves him so its all good.
Do you know what, I actually feel bad for that because I think its the first time you've visited one of my posts and you've not greeted me with manbearpig.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-18 11:44:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2008-07-18 16:41:56 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-18 11:39:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
And Doodles, my five teeth are perfectly white, thanks.
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Quanity > quality
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I also have a hump on my back and a slight limp. Wanna date?
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2008-07-18 11:41:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-18 11:39:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
And Doodles, my five teeth are perfectly white, thanks.
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Quanity > quality
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-18 11:40:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
FALLEN Labyrinth!! COOL!
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-07-18 11:40:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Because its always worth remembering.
I think I spent the first 18 years of my life modelling myself off Jennifer Connnelly... failing miserably...
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-18 11:39:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
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Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-07-18 16:32:38 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
Kate Garraway is pretty awesome too.
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I TOTALLY FANCY HER. though, on a slightly girl to girl rather than girl on girl note, she needs to have a layered haircut to thin out that wiggy looking mop.
I love Fearne fat. Her face looks so old and lined now the podge has gone.
And Doodles, my five teeth are perfectly white, thanks.
Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2008-07-18 11:39:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You remind me of a babe with the power.
the power?
The power of voodoo.
who-doo?
You do.
what?
Remind me of a babe..
---------------------------------------
why did you make me remember that?
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-07-18 11:38:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
That's fallen in love with Kevin Sorbo and I also swear Ubersite is generating typos for the fuck of it today.
F.J. there must be full time crotch watchers ready to post on Youtube at a moments notice. Wouldn't be surprised if their members of some secret crotch watching society.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-07-18 11:35:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Fucking hell I almost died laughing at this video
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZW8wQ1of5nM&feature=related
Who makes these things?!
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-07-18 11:35:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I've just been watching all 5 seasons of Andromeda and have recently realised I've fallen in with Kevin Sorbo...
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2008-07-18 11:33:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I think her teeth are pretty good by your people's standard.
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-07-18 11:32:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Fearn Britten or however you spell her name... I'll go with what ever you've got Orphy. I dunno, she's lost her appeal after she's gone and tried to get all thin... She suits her podge...
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-07-18 11:32:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Kate Garraway is pretty awesome too.
I fuckin love GMTV.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-07-18 11:30:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Its perfectly healthy Banj. And I'm not alone...http://www.fortunecity.co.uk/cinerama/comedy/98/
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-18 11:30:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I think fearne britten rules over lorraine bad teeth kelly
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2008-07-18 11:30:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'd fuck the queen.
You know, after all the bats and cobwebs were removed.
Too much?
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-07-18 11:29:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
F.J. That really is nasty...! icky not to mention probably sticky...
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-07-18 11:27:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-07-18 16:26:33 BST (#)
Ranking: 0
I love Bowie. He was the sexiest man in my teenage life and now I'm all grown up, he's an old many I'd most definitely fuck.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I'd fuck Lorraine Kelly til she split in half.
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-07-18 11:26:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I love Bowie. He was the sexiest man in my teenage life and now I'm all grown up, he's an old many I'd most definitely fuck. Oooh, I feel all crude for saying that... no matter, all so true!
Submitted by Orgasmatron (user info) at 2008-07-18 11:11:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Bo-wahhh: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f4zV4pJ8MwM
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2008-07-18 11:10:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-07-18 11:01:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Hah, shows how much they know! Stoopid government. Whether teenagers drink or not they're anti-social. Its pack and parcel with being a teenager. Let them get on with it and they'll soon get over it.
Buckfast makes me highly sociable and I played a tremendous round of golf!
Buckfast - A drink for the modern golfer
Submitted by Yozz (user info) at 2008-07-18 10:53:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
From Wikipedia: "In recent times, Buckfast has achieved a surprising level of popularity within working class and bohemian communities in certain parts of Scotland, Northern Ireland and the Republic of Ireland. Within the above areas, Buckfast is alleged to be the drink of choice for drinkers who are prone to committing anti-social behaviour when drunk, especially underage drinkers. Its high strength (15% ABV/14.8% in the Republic of Ireland), relatively low price and sweetness are characteristics that traditionally appeal to underage drinkers (similar to other 'problem drinks' alcopops and cider). Many politicians and social activists single out Buckfast Tonic Wine as being particularly responsible for crime, disorder, and general social deprivation in these communities."
Anti-social behaviour tastes yummy.
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2008-07-18 10:51:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-07-18 10:50:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Well I remember listening to a lot of Pantera when I was leaving school and I like Tom Waits.
***
Okay, then we can be friends after all!
Submitted by shadow (user info) at 2008-07-18 10:51:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I try to quit every year. I get a month and a half in, where I should be good, and then I *nearly* murder someone, and drive to the store for a pack.
::sigh::
I am weak.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-18 10:51:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I am glad you are back anyway, despite me only understanding the single word 'Buckfast' in that very Scottish comment.
I saw them at Rock City. they rocked.
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-07-18 10:50:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Well I remember listening to a lot of Pantera when I was leaving school and I like Tom Waits.
Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2008-07-18 10:50:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I quit smoking 2 years ago, cold turkey. The first month was hard for me but after that it's been a breeze. I've craved them, but I've never been tempted. Stick with it and you'll be happy.
I also love Natalie Merchant. Carnival is almost always in my head.
And, I hope your Mom gets better soon and that she also has the strength to stay away from cigarettes. Sadly, some people are so addicted they go back even after having a heart attack.
Best of luck.
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2008-07-18 10:50:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I will not ever put another cancer stick to my lips ever again
---
Does that include shlongy's?
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2008-07-18 10:50:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
OH and futhermore, good job on quitting smoking. I'm going to do it again someday. Perhaps.
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2008-07-18 10:49:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
My taste in music is as follows: Danzig, Pantera, Black Label Socity, Theivery Corporation, Tom Waits, Howlin' Wolf. Mainly. I also like APC, Tool, Godsmack. And I listen to Liz Phair when I'm angsty.
Submitted by sexualchocolate1984 (user info) at 2008-07-18 10:48:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I would like to quit smoking, but I enjoy smoking weed too much and know i couldn't handle one without the other.
I smoke it everyday, all day, at work, at home, while driving anywhere, the only time i don't have a joint on is between breaks at work and while I sleep. I thiink I'm pretty hooked to this non habit forming drug. If you love it is it still an addiciton? Is it not an addiction of choice?
I got bored half way through this but +2 for Cake, what a fucking band.
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-07-18 10:47:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Then I likely hate your taste in music corny, such is the way of the world. Although I'm pretty eclectic.
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2008-07-18 10:46:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I hate your taste in music.
I hope your mom is okay.
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-07-18 10:43:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-18 15:35:17 BST (#)
Ranking: 2
My kids watch this show http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G_4F3lJf8T0
Disgraceful.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Pheeley was that...a...a moneyshot?!
Submitted by Banjo (user info) at 2008-07-18 10:42:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
OMG!!! you JEW live!! I am soooo jealous!
Me, I've been round and about. I've been playing drunken jackey golf with buckfast. I'm starting a campaign. Make buckfast socially acceptable because it doesn't taste bad, its made by monks and its expensive therefore not chavtastic. I decided buckfast was better than the port being bandied about the golf course.
The buckfast day out. I got back to my hotel with a hole up the arse of my jeans having had to squeeze through a fence running for a piss on the 16th hole... Disgraced...!
Buckfast day out, a tale for another day...
Submitted by F.J.Bell (user info) at 2008-07-18 10:42:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I quite smoking full-time, now I only have one or two when I am drinking. And my dealer moved to Brighton (of all places) so I have involuntarily been weaned off weed. Feels good, I suppose.
I sure hope your mammy will be okay.
Submitted by Yozz (user info) at 2008-07-18 10:41:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You cannot be passive and beat the addiction. You need to attack it like its trying to kill you. Which, of course, it is.
P.S. Natalie Merchant is quite amazing.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2008-07-18 10:35:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
WTFINRAT!
Banj! Where have you been?
My kids watch this show http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G_4F3lJf8T0
Disgraceful.
(I seen JEW live)