Scotland: How We've Been Made to Look A Bunch of Prize Cunts (1392 hits)
Category: PoliticsRating: 1.38 on 30 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by TToM: Al Qaeda? You've No Even Got Your Own Football Team! (View user info) at 2009-09-13 14:06:51 EDT
As your resident Scottish representative (all other Scottish Uberites are my official underlings) I can only apologise for the debacle that was the releasing of Abdelbaset Ali Mohmed Al Megrahi.
I'm sure that many of you were righteously pissed off at the quite inappropriate welcome home that he got from the Libyan government. I certainly felt like a right prick with those aresholes waving saltires around.
I was never one that was convinced that he was the only one responsible for the bombing of Pan Am 103 or that he even had anything directly to do with it. I'm fairly certain that he was a patsy, a sacrificial scumbag thrown to the wolves to get the US and Britain off the backs of Libya or whomever was truly responsible.
Given the quite obvious backroom dealings and shadowy agreements that have gone on over Al Megrahi's release it is probably unlikely that we'll ever know the truth.
Everything I've ever read about the incident makes it sound like the whole investigation was a clusterfuck from beginning to the end.
Reports that a baggage area had been broken into were never followed up. The fragment of circuit board that supposedly came from the bomb, which was one of the primary pieces of evidence that convicted Al Megrahi, was apparently never tested for explosive residue. Then the only man ever convicted cancels his latest appeal and is released, thereby losing any chance for some last minute answers. When he dies he takes what he knows with him to the grave.
And die he must, if indeed his cancer is as bad as has been reported. The fact of his illness is what got him released in the first place since, as we all know by now, it is allowable under Scottish law (different from English law, we're always been difficult like that) to release a prisoner on compassionate grounds if they have less than 3 months to live.
This was the excuse certainly, I think by now we all know the reason.
I will not apologise for his release under this law, it is a simple fact of the Scottish justice system. What I will apologise for is that we've been used by the British Government and, more than likely, the US government and probably the security services on both sides of the Atlantic to cut a deal with what is for all intents and purposes a dictatorship.
In short, we've been made to look like a proper bunch of cunts all for the sake of oil.
Of course by now you'd think we would be used to that.
Smeato for First Minister 2010
"This is Glasgow. We'll just set aboot ye."
User Reviews
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2009-09-21 08:30:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Releasing him because he's dying is ridiculous. He should die in prison, alone, by drowning in boiling pig blood, and if he requires any tending to his religious needs before he fades away he should fuck right off to hell unabsolved.
Wow, did I type that out loud?
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2009-09-16 06:45:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Personally I thought releasing him was a pretty sound thing to do. Guy's dying of cancer for fucks sake.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2009-09-14 16:01:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
shoulda force-fed him deep-fried Mars bars until he choked
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2009-09-14 11:54:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2009-09-14 11:13:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2009-09-14 04:02:44 BST (#)
Ranking: 1
The War on Terror is a lot like the War on Crime; just another conflict the US and its allies don't have the stomach for. If you banned all arabs from flying, tortured and killed enough jihadites and their families, and completely torched a town or two, the peasants would capitulate and it would all be over quite quickly
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Right, tell that to the Soviets
Submitted by firefly (user info) at 2009-09-14 10:02:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2009-09-14 09:42:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-41qdoVMY-g
couldn't understand 90% of what he said other than "nae chance" and "set aboot ye."
Submitted by JoeyG (user info) at 2009-09-14 07:41:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This is what happens when people put salt on porridge.
Submitted by locksly (user info) at 2009-09-14 06:38:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
patsy
Submitted by EmissionImpossible (user info) at 2009-09-14 04:02:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
tell you whose a cunt, hurty. he's a cunt.
Submitted by TuTs (user info) at 2009-09-14 02:24:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Why would they give you scots your own parliament?
Submitted by joedaddy (user info) at 2009-09-14 00:30:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
it's nothing personal, just strictly business
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2009-09-13 23:02:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
The War on Terror is a lot like the War on Crime; just another conflict the US and its allies don't have the stomach for. If you banned all arabs from flying, tortured and killed enough jihadites and their families, and completely torched a town or two, the peasants would capitulate and it would all be over quite quickly. Either that or they'd rise up, giving us an excuse to kill them en masse. Either way is fine with me.
Point being it's not Scotland, and on that regard point taken. The problem is that this is all political, and politicoes have no stomach for effective problem solving.
Submitted by willartstorg (user info) at 2009-09-13 21:59:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Gray was da man. Bell blows.
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2009-09-13 21:27:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2009-09-14 02:17:19 BST (#)
Ranking: 1
Alexander Graham Bell.
What a cunt.
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A thieving cunt at that
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2009-09-13 21:17:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Alexander Graham Bell.
What a cunt.
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2009-09-13 21:14:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by redrabbitt (user info) at 2009-09-14 01:49:22 BST (#)
Ranking: 0
Yeah, they would have to change the law or stall it somehow to prevent his release.
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Not really. It was up to the Justice Secretary, Kenny MacAskill, to review Al Megrahi's case and the decision was his sole responsibility (yeah, sure)
Submitted by lungfish (user info) at 2009-09-13 21:12:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
"How We've Been Made to Look A Bunch of Prize Cunts"
You mean...in addition to Liam Gallagher.
Okay, I know he's not Scottish, and so my little joke fails, but I couldn't think of a Scottish cunt off the top of my head. Help me out.
Still, Liam's a cunt, eh?
Submitted by redrabbitt (user info) at 2009-09-13 20:49:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Yeah, they would have to change the law or stall it somehow to prevent his release.
Submitted by YourNameHere (user info) at 2009-09-13 20:29:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2009-09-13 20:22:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
HA! I had forgotten about Smeaton. What a badass...
Submitted by willartstorg (user info) at 2009-09-13 20:14:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"...it is probably unlikely that we'll ever know the truth."
True in almost every political situation.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2009-09-13 18:35:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
yes I've noticed your leaders acting more cuntish than usual.
although I think Brown and Straw stitched him up.
Submitted by GroundHorse (user info) at 2009-09-13 17:58:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
thanks to fg i've got a clue what this is aboot.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2009-09-13 17:17:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
when I watched that suntanned dutchie Elia go around Marshall I thought "this is the moment an entire nation gets put to the sword, but most importantly derek rae the annoying cunt." It was poignant, a solemn max payne bullet-time few seconds unfolding in the beautiful ballet that is world cup football, a country realising some cunt whose grandparents were probably born in some former dutch east africa colony was playing for Holland and about to knock them out of the world cup qualifying stages.
As Elia wheeled away to celebrate I popped another peanut m&m into my mouth and thought "haha this is awesome."
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2009-09-13 16:54:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://johnsmeaton.com/
A grand man whose philosophy can be applied to all.
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2009-09-13 14:36:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Other moments of cultural brilliance this week included the Scottish Sun releasing 'Prayer Mats' that were to be pointed at Hampden and used to pray the Dutch would forget how to play football.
Several relatively high profile people, including Emperor Smeaton, were pictured kneeling.
Incredible.
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2009-09-13 14:27:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Dude, not even a little bit.
They want a bit of the plane to stick in there as well.
Submitted by The_taste_of_Monkeys (user info) at 2009-09-13 14:25:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2009-09-13 19:23:54 BST (#)
Ranking: 0
You know they have a weird little section of The Transport Museum in Glasgow about this? It's mostly devoted to the speculation about what actually happened and how the Seppos are shady bastards.
Quality.
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Hahaha you're fucking shitting me up, right?! That IS fucking quality.
Submitted by HurtByTheSun (user info) at 2009-09-13 14:23:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You know they have a weird little section of The Transport Museum in Glasgow about this? It's mostly devoted to the speculation about what actually happened and how the Seppos are shady bastards.
Quality.