Serious Writers Only Pls (1487 hits)
Category: SportsRating: 0.52 on 73 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by icarus (View user info) at 2009-10-07 17:30:16 EDT
When I was just a squeaker, my friends and I would meet up after school, pool our halloween costumes, hoist my parent's 30 lb VHS camcorder on to a tripod, and restage Ghostbusters or Mega Man or whatever the hell else was popular when we were 10.
It was absolute shit. I never made it to Cannes.
I never became an oceanographer or survivalist either, though I had a sweet 30 gal aquarium and I'd invest loads of free time hiking about the park reserve abutting our grounds, getting to know the trails and local wildlife.
So, here's the thing.
Don't get mad now.
If I'm not a filmmaker, you're not a writer. Yes, I'm absolutely certain you can spell and punctuate. I'm confident you've memorized Freytag's formula, and know several synonyms for words like "gaudy" and "blue". You've probably posted your writing online, and someone who went online at work looking for something to read probably told you that you are the best writer evar on the webz.
Yes, I'm sure they meant it. What? Well, *I* believe they weren't you. Why would I think you would fellate yourself with your own alter(s)? There's really no reason to get all huffy. We're all pals here.
Yes, I know you paid some company to make your work available on Amazon or B&N to forever cement your status as a "published" author. I'm not really sure why. Have you made your money back on the deal? No? Well, that's your own business.
The thing is that there are a lot of writers out there. Some of them are great and some of them are whores who spawn whatever the parent company tell them to. It's all in opinion and how you look at it. What is firmly tangible is the fact that all those writers, good and bad, make a living by submitting their work, just as all proctologists make a living examining the rings of your anus. You don't.
You can talk about famous exceptions; people who were only well known after they died, but do you have a following of tens of thousands? Is your writing pimped in most High School lit courses? No.
So you're not, in the career-sense of the word, quite on the level of this guy http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0681.html or this guy http://www.kanemiller.com/biography.asp?sku=42. So what? Who cares? Writing is something you enjoy, right? You like your characters and story archs, correct? So why would you want to rip them apart at the seams because some cocksmith of an editor or marketing middle-manager thinks the whole thing's not [insert jingoistic catchword] enough? Why do you want to slave over something you currently enjoy?
Try as you like, chances are you'll never become the next Cervantes or Hemmingway or JK Rowling. If you do, chances are even worse you'll do it without turning into the literary Dano Plato. So seriously, why not just enjoy what you're doing without the whole ego thing?
I know it's got a lot to do with society. When you're eight or twelve it's perfectly acceptable to have not-for-profit pursuits. You can join little league, take up the piano... hell, even in college you can take up oil painting or rock climbing. Not so in the adult world. It wasn't a week after I bought my first sailboat that I was told to join the company yacht club.
Seemed it was unthinkable to own a sailboat in our company unless you planned on spending your weekends with coworkers you already found annoying, racing around little bouy-marked triangles. Same went for any .NET skills (So you do web design on the side???) and the Canon Rebel I own (you must do wedding photography!) I quickly found that the concept of having an interest that was neither competitive or profitable was basically unheard of.
Sad, really. One of the few traits that really mark us as a species is the ability to cultivate and adapt new skills. The things we need are fairly standard; it's the things we do for self expression that make us unique. Every society fishes and hunts and hits other societies about the head. Not every society has Lourdes or the Pyramids.
So what I'm really saying is that you don't have to be a professional writer. Just enjoy and share the freedom and self-expression that your medium provides, and perhaps someday you'll catch your break and make it big. Until that time, please try not to top it the knob.
Thanks and have a wonderful tommorow!
User Reviews
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2010-02-09 12:52:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
couldn't agree more.
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2010-02-09 12:02:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
DON'T STFU ME WHEN I'M TRYING TO GET TOOMANYWORDSWORTH HERE TO STFU!
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2010-02-09 11:59:04 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
STFU
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2010-02-09 11:44:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
... what post are you commenting on, Velvet? I'm not seeking commercial publication on ubersite. I'm not seeking commercial publication anywhere at the moment. It's almost like you nev-- ah, I think I get it.
See, the title, "Serious Writers Only Pls", was facetious. So was much of what I said. I'm not sad because the Mega Man movie I made at age 12 never made it to Cannes. I'm not really dissapointed that National Geographic never gave me a job based on my sweet 30 gal fishtank. I apologize if you've spent your entire life living under a rock and were unaware of the concept of sarcasm.
I also admit that it would be very hard to follow this post or its comment train, what with your ADHD constantly shouting things like "OO! IT SAYS ITS ABOUT WRITERS SO YOU OO! TALK ABOUT HOW YOU KNEW AN EDITOR ONCE AND! OH! OOO! USE ENGLISH MAJOR JINGO LIKE 'ARC' AND 'STYLISTICALLY'! YEAH! COMMENT ON STYE BECAUSE IT'S ALL OBSCURE AND HARD TO DEBATE! DON'T LET OUR BA IN ENGLISH GO FOR NOUGHT!!"
I understand that you couldn't finish it, or bother to really read enough to pick up the gist. Let me offer it to you in a nutshell. Writers are writers because they write. Writers should engage in writing because they enjoy, and at some level need to, write. Writing has nothing to do with fame or money, though obviously, as with any art, they sometimes mesg. In my opinion, the sort of people who take the time to troll about the internet bragging about how they are "the only one on this site who has ACTUAL contacts in the Barnes and Noble world of publishing" are like the people who join Karate just so they can say "I have a black belt."
Fuckheads.
In short, you're an arrogant fuckhead. Fuck right off.
Submitted by VelvetElvis (user info) at 2010-02-09 09:55:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Your attitude isn’t going to get you much further than peep skimming your “work” on sites such as this--perhaps this is the core of your anger. I admit I haven’t read much of your writing, but I (and “I” is an alter here for various reasons, and Velvet Elvis is just a pass time joke of sorts, so no ego involved--although I did real well with my old real posts here) but I am perhaps the only person “reviewing” you that actually knows, and knows well, an exec editor at a major publishing house in New York.
She’s a friend, and way cool (American born Asian, Cindy), and she has taken serials from the web--actually only one I know of to be honest -- and made the writer a Writer in the Barnes and Noble sense. Why would you want to burn your bridges, or pass up a foot in the door?
Way back, I tried many times with Big Mike to submit something longer than the average Uber post, he always said “I’m not good enough”. Her house has marketed much worse. I don’t get you. Why not take a chance, and actually trust someone? Say "Read this" and give the link(s)--even from other sites, or send it to me.
You can be bitter all you like, I don’t care, but you should.
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2010-02-09 08:50:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I just love the first year English majors who troll the web just looking to bestow some of their wisdom (or at least some of the fancy terms the professor used) whether it's in any way warranted or not. Yes, the style here is almost as though I am talking to myself and the audience is not even presence. Brilliant observation there. Yet while this style is not stylized in the sense of something you may be more used to (dimestore romance, four-color magazines involving the adventures of people in spandex) it is still stylistic in that it has a style, and in that all writing inherently has a style. Even the ingredient list on the back of a coke can. Please see Hemmingway and the school of stoicism if you have any questions.
Now since I'm not a big fan of the pompadour, or English majors in general, why don't you join Cakes in fucking right off and finding someone who actually wants to hear you talk. Like yourself.
Submitted by VelvetElvis (user info) at 2010-02-09 08:11:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Went back to capture the steampunk pic, and noticed you said “arces”—meaning (advanced reading copies) what writers send out prior to pub. ARCs is the correct term.
-- Do keep in mind previous my review, or not. I wish you well.
Submitted by VelvetElvis (user info) at 2010-02-09 04:10:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
The defining characteristic of your posts, that I’ve read, is that you write/speak, as if to yourself, about the act of writing-- and all that follows, being pubed or no.
This isn’t story telling or stylistically anything, it seems only frustration made manifest. I know the frustration, but my advice to you would be to write “outside of your mind” if that makes sense. Break away from your own thoughts, and there, in a totally new light, put pen to page and see what happens.
Submitted by ridiculous (user info) at 2010-02-09 01:41:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
How did I miss this? I couldn't agree more. While I may be flattered to receive a publishing offer I likely wouldn't agree to it. It is my opinion that the moment you try to make a careeer out of something you enjoy whatever pleasureable pastime you had will immediately become just another job. It will be filled with the same half hearted effort, feeling of general unease and annoyance as any other job. No I wouldn't want to write professionally.
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2010-02-08 23:26:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
People who can read. Shhh, it's OK.
Submitted by TheJesusStrangler (user info) at 2010-02-08 22:59:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
If I was to ask one question about any of this, it would be who cares?
Submitted by namemyforgot (user info) at 2010-01-12 01:35:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm no writer, but I'm professionally lazy and reading/writing English is the only skillset I ever developed and maintained. See, I even used the term 'skillset'. I'm destined for a career creating brochures for government departments. I hope to some day play down the atrocities of a militant superpower for public school text books.
Submitted by root.discussion (user info) at 2009-11-30 21:23:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by pen_name (user info) at 2009-10-17 23:29:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
didn't read it! but i bet it had a swell ending.
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2009-10-09 23:06:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Go kill a tree you fucking hippy faggot.
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2009-10-09 12:25:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
You're posts are (almost) as tired as wel-fare queen's or mcCatum's.
or as tired as my insulting nicknames for those two.
Submitted by DaBeast (user info) at 2009-10-09 11:51:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No more crack for cakes. Bad crack. Bad cakes. Naughty, naughty.
Submitted by catscradle (user info) at 2009-10-09 00:30:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2009-10-07 19:11:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I'm going to have to go with a quote from the blockbuster, Academy Award winning movie, Big.
"I don't get it".
Damn, Schlongy is old school.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2009-10-08 18:50:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I tried by "ignoring her/him" but it didn't seem to help.
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2009-10-08 18:16:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
can someone shut this cakes moron up please.
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2009-10-08 15:31:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This site is about writing like facebook is about networking. I.e., marginally. More of a bonus, really.
Submitted by Cakes (user info) at 2009-10-08 14:39:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I want to apologize for my earlier comments.
There were 3-4 things you wrote that stuck out upon my first quick reading, and holding only those in my mind out of context, I was mistakenly certain you were taunting fledgling writers, and trying to place yourself above them. After re-reading I see this wasn't the case at all.
There's nothing more. I'll poke myself in the eye later. I'm seriously sorry, not because I made a certifiable fool of myself, but cos I tried to make one of you, and you're not.
I'll STFU and all the rest, and slink away. Don't think I'm trying to be some do-gooder writing this, that'd be worse than my comments! I know no one cares, but I couldn't leave this without an apology. (I really do like the pic too.)
Submitted by RoadSong (user info) at 2009-10-08 14:29:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"So what I'm really saying is that you don't have to be a professional writer. Just enjoy and share the freedom and self-expression that your medium provides, and perhaps someday you'll catch your break and make it big."
~~~~~~
It is all about fun for me. I can't write my way out of a paper bag but it is still fun. I am trying to improve in order to better relate the stories told to me by others. I am more of a storyteller in the old way where we sat around the fire telling tales to help the long winter pass.
I barter my photographic skills for lumber or shingles using a camera from WalMart. Family reunions hell yes! It is all good and life is too short to take it too seriously.
This is a GREAT illustration you put on this post!
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2009-10-08 14:23:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
i am too old and senile to keep track of all this faux-UberDrama, srsly.
Just remember rule #6 of Ubersite:
"You are here to entertain us, not the other way around."
Submitted by w_t_a_y_s_t_r_m (user info) at 2009-10-08 12:04:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Mega Man rocks
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2009-10-08 11:41:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Look you, I'm bored today. Supremely bored. And I already apologized for the Shoe thing.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2009-10-08 11:26:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
As much as I have an unfounded dislike for Icarus, I'm not really sure what cakes is trying to prove? That you are more smart than Icarus in a literary, more read up on historical writing, type of way? I'm more knowledgeable about sciences than him but would never boast about it nor would I challenge him to something I specialize in.
Long story short...
GTFO your own post, Spic.
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2009-10-08 11:16:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Aw, it's like you're the necessary antithesis to this post. :)
You could probably skim it beyond "lessee... blah blah blah writing for enjoyment hrm... blah blah don't take yourself so seriously you stupid cooch blah blah Hemmmingway... ERNEST HEMMINGWAY??? [eyes turn red] I'LL SHOW HIM I CAN DROP WAY MORE NAMES THAN THAT!!! BEHOLD THE TRUE CALIBRE OF CAKES, ALTER SUPREME!" but you won't, as you're an alter, and this is just for my amusement.
Thank you, Cakes. I'm amused. Now STFU and GTFO alread, you daft orifice.
Submitted by Cakes (user info) at 2009-10-08 10:50:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Icarus I have to doff my cap to you. I don't know how you've done it but you've managed to seriously offend several people without actually being offensive.
---
Wrong on both counts, Berty. The only thing this person offended was his own (false) sense of literary superiority, more than once--whilst I left it for dead--you only need read much farther down; and the "not being offensive" thing? He was, not in a cool sophisticated way, but in a "Duh, I need more schooling" way.
What he couldn't say/answer was FAR more revealing than anything he managed to say.
I took him to school, and he failed, so bad even I was embarrassed for him.
Carry on, in denial, that's your only option.
Ta ta, off to work.
PS: Icarus, I liked your pic on this post, a lot, btw, it reminded me of Terry Gilliam's Brazil.
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2009-10-08 09:59:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
It's a gift, Bertram.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2009-10-08 09:43:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Icarus I have to doff my cap to you. I don't know how you've done it but you've managed to seriously offend several people without actually being offensive.
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2009-10-08 09:13:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Thank you for proving my point and admitting that you are a pretentious vagina who cares about rankings and uses alters to fellate "her" "real" self. I would tell people not to be like you, but I think that's pretty moot, as you're the only one pretentious and vaginal enough to be you. STFU and GTFO.
Submitted by Cakes (user info) at 2009-10-08 09:08:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Actually that's the first smart thing you've said, cos while you're holding your little unread dick, I'm pissing four miles. And you cannot hang.
I leave you with the fact that I love all writers, bad or good, so long as they're progressing through the demimonde of lit as well as the mainstream. But, you look down upon those that are only here to attempt to give it a shot, and you try to knock them down. Hell no, fuck that. I'm out, I have no respect for you.
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2009-10-08 09:02:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Who in the hell are you talking to? Are you even on the right post? STFU and GTFO.
Submitted by Cakes (user info) at 2009-10-08 08:58:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Oh, that was deep, I never looked at that trilogy in that light.
Submitted by Cakes (user info) at 2009-10-08 08:57:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Tick toc, as you Google--if you even have the balls to try and confrnt me real time.
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2009-10-08 08:57:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Cakes (user info) at 2009-10-08 08:53:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
>>I'll just throw one out there, let's talk about the Rosy Crucifixion Trilogy, and why it was not banned while _____________ was, by the same author.<<
Get your literary pissing contest off my post, you pretentious vagina.
Submitted by Cakes (user info) at 2009-10-08 08:53:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You put up the façade, like him, of knowing lit, yet you didn't attempt to open a dialogue with me about specific writers, and like a little boy, you conveniently call what I said BS. You're as pathetic as him.
And how was my reply self-serving? Cakes is an alter-- if you'd bothered to read my first reply, that was explained.
I'll just throw one out there, let's talk about the Rosy Crucifixion Trilogy, and why it was not banned while _____________ was, by the same author.
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2009-10-08 08:53:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Cakes (user info) at 2009-10-08 05:54:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
>>>You're also wrong about alters. For instance, I simply use one to be even more honest—avoid having to catch up w/ old friends and start the IM-img thing that makes me crazy, and, I have never once rated one of my old post.<<<
Ummmmm K. Who are you again? Sorry, I did not know you were an alter. I don't pay much attention.
>>Btw, after checking, my rating is far higher than yours, since you seem to care so much about skills, w/ two posts with solid +2s, another, the biggest, the same, only accidentally left unranked by a friend, so the 0 broke the streak.<<
... huh? Did you accidentally review the wrong post? When did I say anything about rankings? What are you going on about?
>>And I didn't care, what I cared about was what they said in their review, not the ranking. Their encouragement meant a lot to me, because it was coming from them—the best writer, in my and many people's opinion, who ever posted here.<<
0_o WTF?
>>Hemmingway was simply a journalist, a newspaper man, who reported war events<<
Er, OK. Wasn't really a key part of the post, but let's review. Hemmingway was:
* Paid for his writing.
* His work is covered in most modern American High Schools, and in any college-level survey of American lit.
* He has a global following.
Whether or not you like his work (I'm personally ambivalent) he's a professional, established writer.
>>Your haughtiness is distasteful, but that I could take and even find delightful, if you had the creds to back it up. You don't.<<
I think you missed the point, my dear.
At the most basic level, you write because you enjoy writing, just as I made films as a kid because it's what I enjoyed doing. If you're in it to get a bunch of +2's from a horribly inbred little website, you're in it for the wrong reasons (in my opinion). If you're (further) in it just so that call yourself a (self)"published author" and play the e-diva on said website, you're in it for the wrong reasons (again, my two cents).
That is the point. My being an asshole is completely irrelevant.
Submitted by DaBeast (user info) at 2009-10-08 08:20:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I love cakes' self-serving bullshit. Go back to the manure smorgasboard and load up another heaping plate, cakes, because no one is impressed with you.
Bravo, icarus. A touchy subject for some very touchy people and you dive in, head first. But, tell me, is the jell-o in the swimming pool really that buoyant and is it as disturbing as it looks to slowly sink into it as it fills every orifice? I couldn't do it but I laud your efforts even though I don't believe you can strip another's pretensions away and make them look at themselves in a completely honest light. Honest light isn't flattering or nearly rosy enough for most people. Everyone is the star in their own little drama, after all, even if it should be titled "101 Ways to Suck Shit Through A Straw and Like It". You can, of course, do what I do - call 'em like I see 'em. While this means I have a whopping total of 3 friends, every single one of them values astringent honesty as much - if not more so - than I. I do wonder though why, of us 4, I seem to have taken the role of René d'Herblay. Appropriate in so many ways and wrong in so many others. C'est la vie. We all have our little pretensions.
Keep your chin up, icarus, because, otherwise, you'll have to eat your way out of that jell-o and no one should ever have to ingest that much lime green. Ick.
Submitted by Cakes (user info) at 2009-10-08 06:48:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
You just did a grave disservice to your country, Berty: either you didn't finish reading my review, or... you're an illiterate dolt?
Since the second isn't necessarily the case-- you're too clever for that --it could only be the first.
Although I wasn't, point out where I was wrong.
Submitted by Cakes (user info) at 2009-10-08 06:48:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
You just did a grave disservice to your country, Berty: either you didn't finish reading my review, or... you're an illiterate dolt?
Since the second isn't necessarily the case-- you're too clever for that --it could only be the first.
Although I wasn't, point out where I was wrong.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2009-10-08 06:24:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Cakes (user info) at 2009-10-08 05:54:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
RAAAAAAAWWWWWWWRRRRRRRGGGG!!!
-------------------
... Whut?
Submitted by Cakes (user info) at 2009-10-08 05:54:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
You're talking to yourself in this post, it's painfully obvious. (This would have been almost a +2 if you could have faced/admitted that.)
You're also wrong about alters. For instance, I simply use one to be even more honest—avoid having to catch up w/ old friends and start the IM-img thing that makes me crazy, and, I have never once rated one of my old post.
Btw, after checking, my rating is far higher than yours, since you seem to care so much about skills, w/ two posts with solid +2s, another, the biggest, the same, only accidentally left unranked by a friend, so the 0 broke the streak. And I didn't care, what I cared about was what they said in their review, not the ranking. Their encouragement meant a lot to me, because it was coming from them—the best writer, in my and many people's opinion, who ever posted here.
Also, if you know lit history, you would know that Hemmingway is not one to put on a pedestal; Henry Miller however would be, just to name one of many. Hemmingway was simply a journalist, a newspaper man, who reported war events, then started patching all that into what was America's first look at "the novel" —just as Sir Walter Scott had done a hundred years earlier in England, although Scott did the novel right.
Hemmingway was hype, and had extremely limited imaginative talent (although his short story "Death In The Afternoon" was good. I can think of no other of his works that are even worth mentioning. Yes I've read them, and disliked them all.)
Your haughtiness is distasteful, but that I could take and even find delightful, if you had the creds to back it up. You don't.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2009-10-08 04:41:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Anyone who takes up an artistic persuit with the intent of making money is doing it wrong. You'd make more money by renting downstairs.
Submitted by paxilliona (user info) at 2009-10-08 02:31:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
does this guy make sense, or am I too sleepy
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2009-10-07 21:55:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
way to accept the mediocrity of your own failed life and attempt to transfer your feelings of inadequacy on the rest of us to try and drag us down to your level.
now youve done that, youre only a submission of whatever the fuck project youve got hidden under your bed, and a lucky break away from feeling like youre of more value than the soap scum that has gone untouched in your shower for 6 months.
congrats.
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2009-10-07 21:55:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
way to accept the mediocrity of your own failed life and attempt to transfer your feelings of inadequacy on the rest of us to try and drag us down to your level.
now youve done that, youre only a submission of whatever the fuck project youve got hidden under your bed, and a lucky break away from feeling like youre of more value than the soap scum that has gone untouched in your shower for 6 months.
congrats.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2009-10-07 19:11:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I'm going to have to go with a quote from the blockbuster, Academy Award winning movie, Big.
"I don't get it".
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2009-10-07 18:48:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
wait, what? I didnt' read this, but I skimmed it, waiting for some interesting tidbit to stand out and catch my attention, but none did, so... -2!
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2009-10-07 18:47:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You're a... what... 60-some hetrosexual man who spends a great deal of his time stick up for/fellating a 50-some hetrosexual man. One who said he was leaving because people teased him. So he left. Then came back with an alter. Right? That's the backstory, isn't it?
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2009-10-07 18:41:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
What nonsense is this? I know perfectly well who you are!
Submitted by willartstorg (user info) at 2009-10-07 18:30:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-10-07 18:25:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
oh bubbles, seeing you and orphelia fight the good fight together against the bad guys... you coming to her side in her time of need! it's just so refreshing in this age which seems to have seen the death of chivalry. i applaud you, valiant ped-tard. BRAVO, BRAVO!
==========
Applaud. You givin' me the clap?
AT least you and Feely know who I am. Icky is too stupid to breathe without help.
Come to think of it, who the fuck told you? You didn't do it on your own, dumbass.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-10-07 18:28:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
a rise? i thought this was merely the prelude to some sort of romance, of course none sexual since you must have trouble performing with all that extra weight.
Don't worry though, speccy, I am doing fundraisers for the gastric bypass. you'll be less morbidly obese soon enough.
oh i fear you have mistaken a description of your wifes body with mine! nevermind, I am sure i can send you a few pics to set you right. the tops of my thighs don't touch anymore, but i feel your pain
as for welfare checks oh yes i forgot i sponge off the state of course, not my ex who pays for everything and you are right three children is a ridiculous amount of children i should give one to madonna or elton immediately, probably the mixed race one, they go down better with celebs
oh scourgey how i have missed you
call me!
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2009-10-07 18:26:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2009-10-07 18:19:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2009-10-07 17:51:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
The content of your post seems to contradict the last couple of paragraphs.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I guess it's all in how you look at it, really. The point I was going for is that you shouldn't be so concerned about status. Sure, I never made it to Cannes as a kid, but we had fun making films. If you are too hung up on such items, you get all self-centered annoying.
And people want to pry your eyelids off with a pliers.
Let's face it, though. I only dumped this here with one goal in mind, and that's already been accomplished.
----------
Well then, gotta +2 that.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-10-07 18:25:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
oh bubbles, seeing you and orphelia fight the good fight together against the bad guys... you coming to her side in her time of need! it's just so refreshing in this age which seems to have seen the death of chivalry. i applaud you, valiant ped-tard. BRAVO, BRAVO!
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2009-10-07 18:21:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by willartstorg (user info) at 2009-10-07 18:17:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2009-10-07 18:12:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by willartstorg (user info) at 2009-10-07 18:00:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Why did you re-post? Didn't like my +2? Well, you'll never get another one, you whining piece of shit. You are simply a fucking troll, probably dumber than Doodles. You know NOTHING about self-publishing, writing, or getting along with people. I hope you die reading porn while taking a gooey shit.
Those who attempt serious writing are so far ahead of you that it must make your tiny little brain vomit. Have you ever attempted to be reasonable with others? I rather doubt it. You are a contentious, whinging, retarded little boy with delusions of adequacy. Not only are you stupid, but you are likely ugly and impotent as well. You get your rocks off thinking you are cool on the internet, but you are sadly mistaken.
Just STFU, faggot.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Be nice, Jack.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
You really ARE stupid, aren'tyou??
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
You sure are grouchy. You should pet one of your cats. Are they named things like "Snowball" and "Fluffy", or do you go for author names like Hemmingway and Orwell so it can sound like you're talking to someone important whilst you call them for din-din?
Submitted by skrapmetal (user info) at 2009-10-07 18:21:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Imo +2 this because you're right.
Posts get read. Non-posts don't. I'm speaking directly to frankthebear the Ducky-fearer here, but anyone else can listen. If you write something you think at least doesn't utterly suck, maybe someone else will think so too. You can count on some automatic dirision and knowing that, you can ignore it. You may be able to count on a few automatic accolades, and knowing that you should not take them too seriously either. You don't have to win to have played, but you do have to at least play.
Just write something. Do it. Write something if for no other reason than it provides a shred o' cred to your own ratings of other people's posts.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-10-07 18:20:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i can get a rise out of you without even meaning to (i was going for a senile tirade from bubba, but beggars can't be choosers i guess, so hey ho here we go and all...)!
lesbian, eh? have you REALLY looked at this from all angles? you know you can't keep padding those welfare checks without pumping out more little bastards, right?
probs easier though, as there are no worries about the inevitable flacidity of your partner upon seeing your stretchmarked and pale body when you remove the penis from the equation altogether.
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2009-10-07 18:19:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2009-10-07 17:51:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
The content of your post seems to contradict the last couple of paragraphs.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I guess it's all in how you look at it, really. The point I was going for is that you shouldn't be so concerned about status. Sure, I never made it to Cannes as a kid, but we had fun making films. If you are too hung up on such items, you get all self-centered annoying.
And people want to pry your eyelids off with a pliers.
Let's face it, though. I only dumped this here with one goal in mind, and that's already been accomplished.
Submitted by willartstorg (user info) at 2009-10-07 18:18:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-10-07 18:13:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-10-07 18:10:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
oh, yummers, bubba is flirting with orphelia... and my penis has officially crawled inside of me, likely to never be seen again.
--------------
And let's face it scourgey, the maggot didn't have far to crawl, did it?
:(
-------
Heh. Scourge, she slapped you hard that time, huh, maggotdick.
Submitted by willartstorg (user info) at 2009-10-07 18:17:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2009-10-07 18:12:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by willartstorg (user info) at 2009-10-07 18:00:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Why did you re-post? Didn't like my +2? Well, you'll never get another one, you whining piece of shit. You are simply a fucking troll, probably dumber than Doodles. You know NOTHING about self-publishing, writing, or getting along with people. I hope you die reading porn while taking a gooey shit.
Those who attempt serious writing are so far ahead of you that it must make your tiny little brain vomit. Have you ever attempted to be reasonable with others? I rather doubt it. You are a contentious, whinging, retarded little boy with delusions of adequacy. Not only are you stupid, but you are likely ugly and impotent as well. You get your rocks off thinking you are cool on the internet, but you are sadly mistaken.
Just STFU, faggot.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Be nice, Jack.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
You really ARE stupid, aren'tyou??
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-10-07 18:13:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-10-07 18:10:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
oh, yummers, bubba is flirting with orphelia... and my penis has officially crawled inside of me, likely to never be seen again.
--------------
And let's face it scourgey, the maggot didn't have far to crawl, did it?
:(
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2009-10-07 18:12:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by willartstorg (user info) at 2009-10-07 18:00:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Why did you re-post? Didn't like my +2? Well, you'll never get another one, you whining piece of shit. You are simply a fucking troll, probably dumber than Doodles. You know NOTHING about self-publishing, writing, or getting along with people. I hope you die reading porn while taking a gooey shit.
Those who attempt serious writing are so far ahead of you that it must make your tiny little brain vomit. Have you ever attempted to be reasonable with others? I rather doubt it. You are a contentious, whinging, retarded little boy with delusions of adequacy. Not only are you stupid, but you are likely ugly and impotent as well. You get your rocks off thinking you are cool on the internet, but you are sadly mistaken.
Just STFU, faggot.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Be nice, Jack.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-10-07 18:12:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-10-07 18:10:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
oh, yummers, bubba is flirting with orphelia... and my penis has officially crawled inside of me, likely to never be seen again.
-------------
reminds me of when you used to make me cringe trying to flirt with banjo
*blarf*
anyway, i am a lesbian now, you didn't get the pre xmas update, clearly
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2009-10-07 18:10:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
oh, yummers, bubba is flirting with orphelia... and my penis has officially crawled inside of me, likely to never be seen again.
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-10-07 18:08:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i was probably being a slut more than insultive when i said that anyway
let's face it, you can't teach an old dog new tricks and well, i am both
Submitted by willartstorg (user info) at 2009-10-07 18:07:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-10-07 18:05:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2009-10-07 17:40:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Eat a dick.
---------
I never really understood this as an insult, it sounds like a fun suggestion to me.
'Choke on a cock' is much more violent.
===================
Feely, I've seen you give the response of "eat me." That'sno insult, but a cool offer. ..
Submitted by orphelia (user info) at 2009-10-07 18:05:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2009-10-07 17:40:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Eat a dick.
---------
I never really understood this as an insult, it sounds like a fun suggestion to me.
'Choke on a cock' is much more violent.
Submitted by willartstorg (user info) at 2009-10-07 18:00:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Why did you re-post? Didn't like my +2? Well, you'll never get another one, you whining piece of shit. You are simply a fucking troll, probably dumber than Doodles. You know NOTHING about self-publishing, writing, or getting along with people. I hope you die reading porn while taking a gooey shit.
Those who attempt serious writing are so far ahead of you that it must make your tiny little brain vomit. Have you ever attempted to be reasonable with others? I rather doubt it. You are a contentious, whinging, retarded little boy with delusions of adequacy. Not only are you stupid, but you are likely ugly and impotent as well. You get your rocks off thinking you are cool on the internet, but you are sadly mistaken.
Just STFU, faggot.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2009-10-07 17:51:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
The content of your post seems to contradict the last couple of paragraphs.
Submitted by sicosemen (user info) at 2009-10-07 17:49:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I didn't know that anyone cared this much and the fact that you do...perhaps if you had a hobby you wouldn't have time to be so critical of another. But hey, you lost me with the second 'a' word.
Submitted by catscradle (user info) at 2009-10-07 17:44:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
The title says it all.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2009-10-07 17:40:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Eat a dick.