Diagnose Me And Win A Cookie!! (1780 hits)
Category: GeneralRating: 1.18 on 76 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Ainkara (View user info) at 2005-04-29 08:50:08 EDT
I've always had a little bit of a problem sleeping. If I'm up to date on my sleep, it's not too much of a problem, but when I miss out on a few hours here and there, get a little sleep deprived, it gets harder and harder for me to get to sleep.
I've always had a pretty vivid imagination aswell. Unfortunately it gets more vivid as it gets darker. When I was little I was always terrified that someone would kidnap me, so when I started thinking about it, I slept with my legs out straight, reasoning that it would be harder for someone to take me that way.
Anyway, at night, and especially if I haven't been sleeping too well, my imagination tends to run away with me. I can remember one time, I think I had been staying up late to get things done for school. It then turned out I couldn't sleep at all, because everytime I went into my room, into my bed and tried, it felt like there were bugs crawling all over me. To this day, it's one of the freakiest things that has happened to me. I eventually left my bed one of the nights and went to sleep on the couch.
Lately, I can't seem to stop it. Again, if I've been sleeping alright, it doesn't bother me so much and I can drift off to sleepy-land fine. But if I haven't, I can't seem to stop my mind from imagining dark figures watching me while I sleep, and dark hands reaching out from under my bed to get me. I know, intellectually, that there's nothing there. There was nothing there when the light was on, my door hasn't been opened, there's nothing there now. But sometimes I just can't stop myself from opening my eyes to make sure. This scares me. It's not like I'm some little kid that's scared of the boogie man, I'm supposed to know better. I told my mum about it, and she thinks that it could be because of the break-in a little while ago. (http://www.ubersite.com/m/62929) I hope it's not. I don't want to think that that has affected me this much.
My dreams have been crazy lately too. I have always had weird dreams (I've posted some on here), so dreams that don't mean anything, or slightly scary dreams don't normally bother me for too long. My dreams very rarely make me react. I think I've woken up crying once that I can remember, two other times I've woken up and started crying straight away (all those dreams involved people close to me dying). I've woken up screaming once before, but that wasn't a dream, just my dumbass brother banging on my window as hard as he could. Cockspank. But lately... I had this dream maybe a week ago, I can't remember the details, just that I woke up because I was talking. There was some dark figure, and I was trying to scream but I couldn't. So then I tried to ask what he was doing, but instead all I could say was 'who'. I was just whispering it at first, but I was trying to say it louder because I wanted someone to hear me, because I was obviously scared of this guy. I finally said it louder, only to wake up because I was talking.
Then this morning I woke up screaming. The dream wasn't even really that scary, except maybe in that creepy way that can just get to you sometimes. I was in my loungeroom, and for some reason it was really dark. Then my brother somehow came into the dream (not the cockspank, the other one) and said 'boo'. Then I screamed and woke up.
Anyone have any ideas as to what the fuck is wrong with me? I'll give you a cookie.
User Reviews
Submitted by Xcuses (user info) at 2005-07-25 10:28:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'll diagnos you, but it's gonna cost you
Submitted by Ainkara (user info) at 2005-05-12 06:14:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Oh, it was because I cut the collar and cuffs off of it. I didn't want to say until I heard more inventive ideas. :)
Really though, can someone diagnose me? Or give me a puppy. German Shepard would be nice, thanks.
Submitted by Siren (user info) at 2005-05-12 06:00:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Noooooo way. I'm not falling for this cookie trick again. You never told us why that Little Mermaid shirt inspired that story!!! AND where do you keep getting these creepy pictures? You did give me a cookie for my birthday, though.
Submitted by GodLovesALittleLovin (user info) at 2005-05-01 12:38:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I was going to let the nurse tell you but I love to tell people bad news....
You have cancer.
THATS RIGHT, you're dying. Insomnia is a sure sign of like, eight different types of cancer. I'm guessing you probably have lymphoma, which isn't good, so you'll be dead in like, three hours? BETTER GO GET YOUR SICK ASS A PORNO AND FRIED CHICKEN YEEEEEEE HAW!!
Submitted by ihurtFeellings (user info) at 2005-04-30 14:29:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Heh I drink myself to sleep 3 to 4 nights a week.
Submitted by mrwolf (user info) at 2005-04-30 04:08:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Heathers (user info) at 2005-04-29 12:14:39 (#)
Ranking: 1
Start drinking heavily, then you will just pass out. AND hopefully be to drunk to remember your dreams.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
That's how I get to sleep everynight, sad thing is I'm not even joking. Best advice yet.
Submitted by Wazza (user info) at 2005-04-30 03:55:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
It is called meditation dear buy a book and practice,but it takes discipline!I had the same problem for years ,now i can sleep on a barbed wire fence.
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2005-04-30 03:38:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You've got insomnia.
Don't worry about anything the other people have suggested, just try to sleep it off.
Submitted by Anansie (user info) at 2005-04-29 23:38:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You probably just need to get laid.
Or you're crazy.
Or both.
Welcome to the club.
Submitted by optide (user info) at 2005-04-29 23:03:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm gonna extrapolate on something basic, but maybe it might be on the right track.
When we sleep, or rather, enter the area in which we usually sleep, out minds begin to prepare our bodies to sleep. Functions slow, we become increasingly physically tired etc. However, this process is the product of a pattern of repeated actions, your brain recognizes where you are and whats going on, and responds as such. If you create a new pattern, like the frightening one you have, your body will actually begin to repeat this cycle involuntarily. In other words, find a way to sleep ALL THE TIME, and do it for awhile, with a little luck, and a lot of effort, you might work it out on your own.
Submitted by bart (user info) at 2005-04-29 21:27:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I have dreams exactly like that.
If you figure out the answer, let me know.
My understanding is that it's the effect of intense lucid dreams. If you're woken up during these periods, your body may be paralyzed because the brain shuts off your motor control while you're asleep to prevent you from physically acting out your dreams.
If you're otherwise stressed or your mind is racing on some other topic, it will not be completely dedicated to shutting off your body. It seems that the last thing to shut down is the mouth, so as you're going through the dreams, you'll end up talking out loud in your sleep. Your still-in-the-real-world ears are not connected to your dream babbling mouth, so you can actually startle yourself with what you're saying, enough to wake you from your sleep.
Submitted by PatheticCapitalistFuck (user info) at 2005-04-29 20:09:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Snore when you sleep?
Sleep Apnea?
Submitted by howto (user info) at 2005-04-29 19:21:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Looks like you've got a bad case of dolebludge-itis.
Submitted by Death_Metal_Dude (user info) at 2005-04-29 18:57:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
AIDS
Submitted by WhatTheHell (user info) at 2005-04-29 15:44:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I don't give a flying fuck what's wrong with you...
You're cute and have nice tits.... shut the fuck up already, what more does a girl need?
Now gimme my fucking cookie woman!
Submitted by Lisa (user info) at 2005-04-29 14:48:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Do you take any medications?
Submitted by whiskey_jack (user info) at 2005-04-29 14:38:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I think you've come down with a case of sexy. Booya!
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2005-04-29 12:53:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
It's all been said, but I would think that it would be more abnormal not to be upset by the break in.
Submitted by Bizdorph (user info) at 2005-04-29 12:38:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I diagnose you with lack of freaky loving from me, and I can write you a prescription any time.
Submitted by TheSunGod (user info) at 2005-04-29 12:32:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
from the time i was ten i have believed that there is a scary little redheaded boy who lives under my bed who will grab my hands or feet if i hang them off the bed while i sleep. if he gets a hold on me, he will bite my fingers or toes.
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2005-04-29 12:23:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
A doctor is going to tell you the same thing that Mike and I told you.
Submitted by Fartman (user info) at 2005-04-29 12:18:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
You may have a brain tumor.
The size of a basketball.
Submitted by Heathers (user info) at 2005-04-29 12:14:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Start drinking heavily, then you will just pass out. AND hopefully be to drunk to remember your dreams.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-04-29 12:03:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Fellate me and win a new purse, jacket or dinner.
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2005-04-29 12:02:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
See a fucking doctor, don't get the collective medical advice of a bunch of retards.
Myself included.
Submitted by Avals (user info) at 2005-04-29 11:58:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You're a freaking loony, just like everyone else on this site.
But on a more serious note:
Sleeping less might might help the symptoms, even if it doesn't solve the problem. Go to bed late, when you're really tired and would fall asleep quickly. Don't oversleep. This works perfectly if you need to wake up early for work or school since you NEVER GET ENOUGH FUCKING SLEEP THAT WAY. And never, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES, take naps during the day. If you slept very little during the night, wait for the next night. That way you can fall asleep earlier and easier. The exception to this is if you have something important to do which you can't screw up; in that case, nap before and deal with the consequences... Oh yeah, and driving tired is a really bad idea.
In broader terms, it does sound like you don't feel safe in your home. Others have suggested better ways to fix that than I could come up with. Having a big strong man you trust to protect you by your side would probably work great; but then again, that's not very easy. I'd volunteer, but I'm a bit too far away for that ... nor am I particularly big or strong. I suggest you recruit one of the Australian Uberites to protect you. You could pay him with +2s.
Or you could always get shit-faced before bed, I guess. Alcohol solves all problems.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-04-29 11:54:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
How about we skip my diagnosis and get right to the cunnilingus?
Now where's my fucking cookie?
Submitted by DavyJones (user info) at 2005-04-29 11:49:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Didn't bother with the reviews, so I'm probably the 20th person to say so, but...
You clearly need a good dicking.
Submitted by zakalwe (user info) at 2005-04-29 11:49:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Whatever your problem, the cure is dick.
Submitted by TheSpook (user info) at 2005-04-29 11:25:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Diagnosis: You're a woman
Treament: Stay the fuck away from me.
Submitted by Ainkara (user info) at 2005-04-29 11:21:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Circe, I'm already on the pill and have been since I went to Indonesia.
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2005-04-29 11:11:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Bec, darlin', your hormones are shifting from puberty into adulthood - that's all it is. Once your brain chemistry adjusts, you'll be okay. In the meantime, going on the pill or getting a depo-provera injection can help, as can implanon.
Submitted by MrSparkle847 (user info) at 2005-04-29 11:01:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by The_Grammar_Nazi (user info) at 2005-04-29 10:52:35 (#)
Ranking: 2
Now gimme my damn cookie before your organs liquify.
_____________________
You are the 100,000,000th person to figure out what's wrong! Click here to claim your cookie: http://www.intellectualconservative.com/images/cookie.jpg
Submitted by Ainkara (user info) at 2005-04-29 11:01:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Calm down indo, all cookies will be distrubuted shortly.
Submitted by firefly (user info) at 2005-04-29 10:56:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by indoninja (user info) at 2005-04-29 10:54:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Where is my cookie!
You have a mild form of narcolepsy!
Submitted by The_Grammar_Nazi (user info) at 2005-04-29 10:52:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Sounds like Marburg to me. Have you gone to Angola lately?
Now gimme my damn cookie before your organs liquify.
Submitted by MrSparkle847 (user info) at 2005-04-29 10:50:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
My sleeping habits are pretty erratic, too. This morning I got up at 8, went on Uber, then went back to sleep until 10:30. I dreamt I was doing something Harry Potter based, but a stage/play version of it, and I played Harry and the guy playing Voldemort decided to ad-lib last minute and not kill me, but make it look like he did. It was really weird because rather than have a wand, he had a gun, and he just fired it into the air. The actor was actually a pretty swell guy, and he was very pleased that I went with it instead of get confused. Somehow that segued into me being in some far eastern country (maybe it was China or Japan) and being in a weird shop selling cigarettes at $0.30 a pack.
If someone can accurately figure out what the fuck is wrong with me, I'll give him TWO cookies.
Submitted by Ainkara (user info) at 2005-04-29 10:43:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
munkey, I don't have caffiene at all. I hate coffee, rarely drink tea (even though I love it), don't drink anything else with caffiene.
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2005-04-29 10:41:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
seriously,
just something to try...
don't have caffeeine after 3 pm. Try it.
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2005-04-29 10:26:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I think you're suffering from pangs of guilt for not giving me more cookies...
Submitted by wookie (user info) at 2005-04-29 10:21:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I think you've got a brain tumor.
Or rectal cancer.
Submitted by Mario (user info) at 2005-04-29 10:13:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Just give me the cookie.
But yeah, you're stressed out, that's all. It'll pass....butterscotch...mmmm.
Submitted by Bigmike (user info) at 2005-04-29 10:08:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Ainkara (user info) at 2005-04-29 10:05:58 (#)
Ranking: 0
Mike, I want a dog. My mum won't let me get one. I want a german shepard....
But you can have cats? Makes no sense to me. Keep trying.
Submitted by Ainkara (user info) at 2005-04-29 10:05:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Mike, I want a dog. My mum won't let me get one. I want a german shepard....
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2005-04-29 10:05:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I think you've got...
Beautiful eyes.
Submitted by sublime (user info) at 2005-04-29 10:04:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
its syphillis
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2005-04-29 10:00:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Don't worry DeathJester, she'd never go for me. She's yours forever.
Submitted by hairycoo (user info) at 2005-04-29 09:54:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
suddenly every mother fucker is a psychologist.
what a pretentious bunch of tossers
Submitted by Bigmike (user info) at 2005-04-29 09:51:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Your dreams suggest that you feel helpless to control the things around you. They also suggest that you have worries about your own personal safety and security. I think you realize these concerns but feel helpless to do anything about it.
That being said, do what I do.
Check all your doors and windows before going to bed. I do this so that my children are safe. Get a motion detector light for your entrances. Nothing stops intruders more quickly than being bathed in an ocean of one hundred watt goodness. Darkness is the ally of thieves and criminals. Take it away from them and they will stay away.
Get yourself a dog. Cats are only good at leaving hair all around and stinking up the litter. A dog, no matter how stupid they may seem, understands the idea of territory and boundaries. They will protect those boundaries and all the ones they love surrounded by it. They have excellent hearing and a greta sense for whether or not someone is good or bad. I have two dogs and if they wake me up by barking in the middle of the night I know something is not quite right.
If you are confident that you are protecting yourself then your sense of security will come back to you and you will sleep much better.
Just my take on the whole thing.
Submitted by DeathJester (user info) at 2005-04-29 09:49:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2005-04-29 09:26:14 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by FuckTheArmy (user info) at 2005-04-29 09:05:30 (#)
Ranking: 1
Hmm. Let's begin at the Freudian approach: you have repressed sexual urges. But then that's everyone on this website.
Dreams, as I understand it (though you know I'm not actually a shrink) are often a way of the mind trying to clear itself. Most of the harmless wierd dreams are sort of like the "testing, testing" people often do with microphones, but a few are pieces of really distressing stuff you can't make real sense of subconsciously. Your mum may be right about the break-in.
I suggest a good dose of peace of mind, and talking about this to people - in person. You should consider seeing a psychologist (if you're rich enough) or just talk to your close friends about it. In person or over the phone is best, and the more caring the person the better. Try and be nice to people; this may not necessarily have an effect on your sleep patterns but you'll sure as hell get a better response from most people anyway. Positive reassurance may help your subconscious, 'loosen up', as it were.
Third, get out there and do a fuckload of exercise. Be it cardiovascular gym/running exercise, or something as new-age as meditation, or just do a little physical labour. This will hopefully make you tired enough to forget your problems and actually get some shuteye.
And above all: go hug someone.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
You don't need a shrink and treating the symptoms won't solve the problem. You already know the problem: your frightened and want protecting.
Soloution: buy a gun, or seduce a big strong man to share your bed. I will selflessly put myself forward as a candidate.
-------------------------
Judas!
Submitted by Feijuada (user info) at 2005-04-29 09:46:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Wrong, wrong, WRONG! Everybody, shut up! The problem is that she's flapping her gums all day and night when she should be on her knees, either pleasuring a man of scrubbing the floor.
Submitted by NotSteve (user info) at 2005-04-29 09:45:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2005-04-29 09:24:47 (#)
Ranking: 0
You're manic depressive.
--------------------------------
This is what I thought when reading your post. It sounded like clinical depression to me. But I'm just and idiot.
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2005-04-29 09:43:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
BTW: Bradradamus has spoken.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2005-04-29 09:43:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Anyone have any ideas as to what the fuck is wrong with me?"""
You think you're special and should definitly stop sharing your emo shit with Über.
Thank you for complying.
Submitted by hairycoo (user info) at 2005-04-29 09:42:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
btw WHERES MY FUCKING COOKIE!
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2005-04-29 09:42:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Ok, I just read it.
Sounds to me like you're having a similar experience to one I had fairly recently. http://www.ubersite.com/m/54706
Try this: rearrange your room. Put everything in a different order. It might just untie whatever is triggering this response in your mind. This is what I'd prescribe if I were your psychiatrist.
You have an anxiety disorder. You're already slightly agorophobic, as evidenced by your unwillingness to even go out of your room the whole time you were in Indonesia, when most people, even if scared, would at least venture out a little out of sheer curiousity. You are probably over-protected by your parents, and this has instilled in you certain irrational fears about your surroundings. If you had a recent break-in, this could have most certainly given you an overall sense of exposure and vulnerability even in your own bedroom, which is usually a sanctuary for you.
Change all that - purge the demons by taking a day to clean and rearrange your room - your personal space - reaffirm your dominion over it, and the nightmares will stop.
Submitted by hairycoo (user info) at 2005-04-29 09:38:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Feijuada (user info) at 2005-04-29 09:32:12 (#)
Ranking: 2
You are talking too much, like all women. Shut up, and you'll get better.
____
aaaaajajaja
Submitted by Feijuada (user info) at 2005-04-29 09:32:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You are talking too much, like all women. Shut up, and you'll get better.
Submitted by mbstateside (user info) at 2005-04-29 09:31:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I'd say Fuck the Army has given the best advice so far (he really quite sensitive for a guy with a name like that isn't he?)
The only thing I'd add in addition is go to bed reading.
A) because it will help to relax you.
B) And more importantly it will give that over active imagination somthing to focus on besides bugs and big scary men. Obviously I'd stay away from horror books but other than that anything which draws you in should be fine. If you want to have fun dreams I'd recommend either somthing funny or raunchy or maybe both oh what fun you could have.
Submitted by Viciousriffs (user info) at 2005-04-29 09:28:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You've changed your diet recently, haven't you? Try to refrain from eating any foods with high amounts of sugar before you go to bed, and force yourself into a state of calm and relaxation, as stated previously, to ensure a bit of normality in your sleeping patterns. The most important thing is to find something that is effective for you- I will illustrate....
Masturbating 20,000 times, smoking a cigarette, and curling up on my left side puts me to sleep within 20 minutes every time. (One of these statements is slightly true, can't say which one). The bottom line is to find a way that works to keep you relaxed, and push you into exhaustion. Try things out, let me know how it goes, I'm not an insomniac, I'm just insane.
Submitted by indoninja (user info) at 2005-04-29 09:28:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I forgot to mention not to work out right before bed. Try and have a 2-3 hour window between working out and sleep ing so your body can cool down and relax.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2005-04-29 09:26:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by FuckTheArmy (user info) at 2005-04-29 09:05:30 (#)
Ranking: 1
Hmm. Let's begin at the Freudian approach: you have repressed sexual urges. But then that's everyone on this website.
Dreams, as I understand it (though you know I'm not actually a shrink) are often a way of the mind trying to clear itself. Most of the harmless wierd dreams are sort of like the "testing, testing" people often do with microphones, but a few are pieces of really distressing stuff you can't make real sense of subconsciously. Your mum may be right about the break-in.
I suggest a good dose of peace of mind, and talking about this to people - in person. You should consider seeing a psychologist (if you're rich enough) or just talk to your close friends about it. In person or over the phone is best, and the more caring the person the better. Try and be nice to people; this may not necessarily have an effect on your sleep patterns but you'll sure as hell get a better response from most people anyway. Positive reassurance may help your subconscious, 'loosen up', as it were.
Third, get out there and do a fuckload of exercise. Be it cardiovascular gym/running exercise, or something as new-age as meditation, or just do a little physical labour. This will hopefully make you tired enough to forget your problems and actually get some shuteye.
And above all: go hug someone.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
You don't need a shrink and treating the symptoms won't solve the problem. You already know the problem: your frightened and want protecting.
Soloution: buy a gun, or seduce a big strong man to share your bed. I will selflessly put myself forward as a candidate.
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2005-04-29 09:24:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You're manic depressive.
Submitted by Teephphah (user info) at 2005-04-29 09:24:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
The best advice I've seen so far is clearly B_BOB's, but you may need to up the dosage to get a real good pass-out.
Freebie and your mom are probably on to something too. Break-ins can be VERY emotionally disturbing, and if you haven't really dealt with it on an overt level, it could be your subconscious fucking with you, telling you to do so.
Did these [more disturbing than normal] dreams start flaring up only after the break-in? That's the impression I got from reading this.
Other than all that, or, assuming the problem is not linked to the break-in, I would try to look at it as the price you pay for being creative. Your mind comes up with crazy shit, some of it you actually tend to believe even though you know you shouldn't. This is what gives you the ability to spin stories out of the aether, but it is also what makes you think there are hands reaching out from under your bed to grab you.
As for dealing with it . . . take naps. Go above and beyond what sleep you think you need. Overdo it for a while. Sleep deprivation is a bitch, and they are finding out more and more just how severely it can mess with you. (Driving sleepy is almost as dangerous as driving drunk, they say.)
Submitted by indoninja (user info) at 2005-04-29 09:21:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
"Third, get out there and do a fuckload of exercise. Be it cardiovascular gym/running exercise, or something as new-age as meditation, or just do a little physical labour. This will hopefully make you tired enough to forget your problems and actually get some shuteye"
Solid advise.
Also on the days when you don't get enough sleep do you nap during the day? If so stop, napping can mess up your night time sleep. Do you read or watch TV in your bed? Don't do that either make your bed just for sleeping (or sex) that way your mind is conditioned to sleep when it is there.
The feeling of hands touching you, or thinking you see something in your room (have you ever fealt like you can't move for a few seconds) are all signs of narcolepsy a fairly common sleeping disorder. When you feel this is happening and you are having trouuble sleeping, get out of bed, turn on a dim light and try to read for a while, ehrn you feel ready to sleep again, get back into bed and try again. Just sitting in bed getting upset about not sleeping will make it harder to sleep.
I like white choclate macadamia cookies.
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2005-04-29 09:16:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
As your well aware it's caused by anxiety, I shouldn't worry (haha) about the break in as it will probably stem from just about every neurosis you have, especially as you've had it all this time.
My advice would be to try to create a relaxing environment before you go to sleep. Maybe excercising before sleep would help.
Submitted by Totally_useless (user info) at 2005-04-29 09:14:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Forgot these two:
Oneirophobia- Fear of dreams.
Oneirogmophobia- Fear of wet dreams.
Submitted by Totally_useless (user info) at 2005-04-29 09:12:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You may have one of the following:
Kolpophobia- Fear of genitals, particularly female.
Ithyphallophobia- Fear of seeing, thinking about or having an erect penis.
Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia- Fear of long words.
Geniophobia- Fear of chins.
Francophobia- Fear of France or French culture. (Gallophobia, Galiophobia)
Defecaloesiophobia- Fear of painful bowels movements.
Yes, they are all real phobias. Truth is, you probably have a bit of this:
Achluophobia- Fear of darkness.
That, and check your home for gas leaks.
Where's my fucking cookie?
Submitted by hairycoo (user info) at 2005-04-29 09:10:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
ur a bunny boiler
Submitted by freebie (user info) at 2005-04-29 09:08:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Forgot my diagnosis: Dr. Freeb says you have congenital syphilitic insomniosis complicated by
repressed aberrant sexuality syndrome.Hope this helps.
Submitted by freebie (user info) at 2005-04-29 09:06:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Damn, all along you knew I was under the bed, reaching for you in the dark....while you're sleeping and helpless....mwahahahahaaaa....
Submitted by FuckTheArmy (user info) at 2005-04-29 09:05:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Hmm. Let's begin at the Freudian approach: you have repressed sexual urges. But then that's everyone on this website.
Dreams, as I understand it (though you know I'm not actually a shrink) are often a way of the mind trying to clear itself. Most of the harmless wierd dreams are sort of like the "testing, testing" people often do with microphones, but a few are pieces of really distressing stuff you can't make real sense of subconsciously. Your mum may be right about the break-in.
I suggest a good dose of peace of mind, and talking about this to people - in person. You should consider seeing a psychologist (if you're rich enough) or just talk to your close friends about it. In person or over the phone is best, and the more caring the person the better. Try and be nice to people; this may not necessarily have an effect on your sleep patterns but you'll sure as hell get a better response from most people anyway. Positive reassurance may help your subconscious, 'loosen up', as it were.
Third, get out there and do a fuckload of exercise. Be it cardiovascular gym/running exercise, or something as new-age as meditation, or just do a little physical labour. This will hopefully make you tired enough to forget your problems and actually get some shuteye.
And above all: go hug someone.
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2005-04-29 08:55:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
A glass (or 6) of alcoholic beverage before bedtime should put you right out.
Submitted by phuzzygish (user info) at 2005-04-29 08:53:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I would suggest a good, hard rodgering, but I'm not sure if that'll fix the problem...
Could be fun anyway though.
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2005-04-29 08:53:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
You're a mental defective, just like me and everyone else I know.